Burns
by a bit of slytherin
Summary: Taylor loses everyone in her life, except her sister. She moves to the Palm woods as a last resort. This is where her long time best friends have been living for a year. With severe burns on her face how will she cope with this life she is forced to live?
1. Chapter 1

Gone

They were gone, all gone. Mom was first to go. She hit me hard. I was 10. The boys were there but, it still cut a hole in my heart. I lost my mom to cancer when I was ten. I handled it about as well as I could have. I cried myself to sleep for a week or two and slowly the sobs turned to cries, then to whimpers and finally silent tears. Kendall lived next door. He would cross the tree into my room and would hold me when I sobbed. I became closer to him then the others.

Dad opened the hole again 4 years later. He left us. Lucy, Trevor and Me. He left. After beating me and my sister for too before he left. Again Kendall comforted me when I sobbed and cried. But he never knew Dad hit me too, he thought it was just Lucy. Trevor left after my 15th birthday to join the army. He thought he had failed with me and Lucy. But really he saved us from going through it alone. Lucy and I were sent to our grandmothers

Then my boys left. My boys, Logan, James, Carlos, and Kendall. James always wanted to be famous. He wasn't bad at singing, but Kendall always had the heart. He would sing to me all the time. I couldn't help smiling when he did that. Logan was the brains of our operation, always talking scientifically and keeping us from doing something too stupid. Carlos was the daredevil of our group. Without his helmet, our little stunt man wouldn't be here today. He makes our life 'interesting'. James is the pretty boy. Gets all the girls(except me). Fixes his hair to perfection and James is in fact, my personal stylist. What? He knows how to make a girl look could. Kendall was our leader. He helped choose from right and wrong, or too attack or surrender. They always said I was the glue. I kept everyone held together. I had no side in arguments and I would be their cheerleader( when I wasn't playing field hockey).

I had four brothers, that I trusted completely and cared for immensely. But, I had four older, very protective brothers. I couldn't even stand next to another guy if one of the others were there.

_Flashback_

"_Hey Taylor." Dean Crofter said as he walked up to me. He gave me a small shy smile, which I immediately return. I'm not going to deny it. Dean is cute. With his dirty blond hair and bright blue eyes. I take a quick glance around, no boys yet better do this quickly. "Hey Dean" I replied. I only had a short amount of time before they see. Alone, with a boy. "What's up?" I asked excited, clearly showing it in my face." Well I was wondering…" He stumbled out. My excitement grew with each word. "Yes?" I replied with a slight flirtatious tone. Hey, I needed this date. "would you like to go…." He was cut off by a loud scream. "TAY-TAY!" Of course. James and Carlos. I sighed, there goes my chance for the dance this Friday. It is only two days away! I gave an apologetic glance to Dean. I turned to the boys. Both of them grinned at me and then turned to Dean. Their smiles turned to glares and they put their arms around me. "So, Dean what did you want to ask me?" I asked while tucking some of my bangs behind my ear. I kenw this was a cute tactic, I was desperate. He gulped and looked and the two boys. Both were still glaring at him. "Yeah, Dean, what?" James spit out. Dean gulped again. He looked really nervous, really nervous. But who could blame him? "Uhh.. He started "would you…" James and Carlos intensified their glares, if that's possible. "Uhh… He gulped "never mind. See you later Taylor!" He quickly walked off. I huffed and turned around. I turned on my glare and they instantly looked sheepish. I stalked off. Then I met up with Kendall and Logan. "What happened?" Logan asked instantly noticing my ticked off expression. "James and Carlos just lost my chance with Dean Crofter." I growled. Kendall sighed in relief. "Good, he doesn't deserve you." I turn to glare at him. "And who does Kendall?" I ask him with poison dripping from my tone. He instantly looked scared. Logan instantly stepped between us. "Listen Tay, Kendall, James and Carlos were just playing the stupid over protective brother role." I visibly relaxed. Kendall let out a sigh. I whip around and it him upside the head. "Ow! Taylor!" Kendall groaned as he held his head. " That's for trying to rule my life. You know I need a date for the dance. I am so not going alone again." He looked at me sympathetically. I relaxed and hugged Logan. I kiss his check. " Thanks Logie, you always know how to calm me down." Logie smiled and returned the hugged me back. Hey, brothers are brothers. They do stupid things._

_End Flashback _

That was a month before they left. I did end up getting a date. I grabbed a soccer player named Jesse Finner. I had an okay time, but halfway through he left to go flirt with some seniors. I got it. I'm younger and not as pretty. Logan and Carlos, who were also dumped by their dates, stayed with me. I danced my heart out and had a good time. But I left early dragging Lucy behind me. We had to get home early, or more chores to do for being late.

The boys understood.

The week they left I was at field hockey camp, feeling like a normal girl. Boy, was I wrong. I found out the boys left when I got back. They left their homes, Minnesota and friends. They left me.


	2. Chapter 2 someone to go to

_A/N Hey, I've already written the first few chapters up, so I can update pretty quickly. And as Totally Awesome owning Big Time Rush would be, I don't so I guess I have to live with it. Enjoy! _

_**Someone to go to**_

_**Taylor's pov:**_

Life hates me. That stupid oven ruined everything. I leave it alone for 5 minutes to check on Lucy, and it goes and burst into flames! Lucy was passed out on the couch from exhaustion. The flames spread quickly. And by the time I realized the fire, it had become hard to breathe. I grabbed Lucy and tried to get out. All exits were blocked. I couldn't get out with Lucy. I was exhausted and lightheaded. I sunk to the floor and covered Lucy's body with mine. Then everything went black.

That's the last thing I remember. I woke up in the hospital. Apparently our neighbors saw the fire right on time. Lucy was beside me, in her own bed. She was still sleeping. Luckily both of us were fine or so I thought. God, it hurts just to think about it. Lucy was fine, thank God, but since I protected her, I had severe burns on my face. You could barely tell it was me! I looked like a freak, and I've accepted that. Lucy said she could tell by my eyes, but I knew she had to say that. The blaze killed grandma, so its just me and Lucy. No one else. My list of family is rapidly growing smaller. I only have Lucy left.

Unless, no, they wouldn't want me. I have to get that out of my head. These foster people, they're threatening to split us up. Go to different homes. I flat out refused. I threw a fit. No way are they separating me and my sister. I can't lose her too. My life would surely collapse. So I have no choice. I call the closest family I knew. Mama Knight. I have now idea how many times I must gone over there. To seek advice, to look for a mother figure. And Mama Knight was always there. She was my someone to go to. Of course there was always Katie. She became my little sister, other than Lucy. And the boys were there to. Always, of course not now. But who could blame them? Their famous now, and could have all that they want. But that's not the point, Lucy and I need someplace to go. So I call Mrs. Knight up. I knew by now that she was in California, at a place called The Palm Woods.

Of course, it was Kendall who answered. "Hello?" Kendall's voice answered through the phone. I could instantly tell he was smiling. You can always tell with Kendall. I couldn't speak. He sounded so happy. I couldn't ruin his day with this. "Hello? Who is this?" His tone turned slightly serious. See what I mean? Even when I'm not speaking, his happiness is vanishing. "Is Mrs. Knight there?" I manage to croak out. "She's right here, Who is this?" He questioned. "Tell her it's from an old friend." I say. It was becoming easier to talk to him. "Okay, here she is." I sigh. Good, I don't have to hold back anymore tears. I hear shuffling on the other end. The Mrs. Knight spoke. "Hello? Who is this?" I was wrong I hold back more tears as I say. "Hey, Mama Knight. Its Taylor."

**Kendall's Pov:**

We were playing dome hockey when the phone rang. As I walked over, Carlos tackled James to the floor. James started crying about his hair. Logan and I shared a look and burst out laughing. **(A/N who wouldn't?)** I picked up the phone. "Hello?" I asked still struggling not to laugh. There was no answer. I stopped laughing. "Hello? Who is this?" I asked again. This time a croaking voice said. "Is Mrs. Knight there?" I was slightly shocked by the voice but none the less I answered. "Yeah, she's right here. Who is this?" I ask the voice. "Tell her I'm a old friend." Jeez, mysterious much? But still handed the person over. "Ok, Here she is." Mom took the phone. "Hello?" Mom started. Her face suddenly broke out in surprise. "Oh my God! How are you kiddo?" Her face suddenly went dark. " Nothing bad happened did it?" Mom looked so sad. What was making her this way?

Mom slowly left the room. She seem to take forever. But then she finally came back. With the phone hung up. She had a sad expression on her face." Mom, I questioned, "who was that?" She turned her somber countenance toward me. "That was Taylor Bell, Kendall, she sighed, "Something's happened to her."

_**A/N **_

_**There you go. Hoped you liked!**_

_**Review please!**_

_**Bye!**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Hey, I've been really busy, so forgive me!**_

_**I don't own Big Time Rush**_

**Chapter 3 For Taylor!**

_Kendall's Pov_

"Oh my god" Katie gasped. "What's happened?" Mom turned to her. "There was a fire, their grandmother's dead. They have no where else to go except here." At this we got confused. We didn't know a Taylor Bell. Why would she come to live with us? Carlos asked the question we were all wondering.

"Who's Taylor? And why is she coming here?" James, Logan and I nodded in agreement. At this Katie turned to us. She had a glare on. Carlos shrank back, looking deathly afraid. "Are you kidding me!" Carlos shook his head. Katie looked enraged. "Who's Taylor? She's only your best friend since 1st grade! My older sister figure! The daughter Mom never had! The little sister you guys are way to protective of! The one that has had a terrible life since she was 10! That Taylor! By this time Katie had tears streaming down her face.

We all were shocked by her outburst. Even Mom who had tears in her eyes. The it started to come back to me. Taylor, Tay. Oh my god! How could we forget about Tay-Tay! How could we do that to our Tay? "How could we forget about her?" I thought out loud. The boys hung their heads, ashamed. "Tay-Tay….." I heard James mutter. Tay, now I remember her. We missed her so much. I miss her so much. She would always stop us from fighting. Even throwing herself into the fight to break it up. She would always come to anyone in need. Once, Veronica Marres humiliated Taylor in front of the whole school, and Tay found her in the bathroom. Crying over her boyfriend who cheated on her. Even though that morning happened, Taylor still comforted her and helped her get over it. They've been friends ever since. I held her when she cried over her mother, father, and brother. Who held her when we left? Lucy I hope. Not another boy, hopefully. I laughed with her, watched the way her face light up when one of us entered the room. I even helped her fight her battles.

Her life hasn't been a fair one. I mean first her mom dies. Then her father becomes abusive towards her sister and leaves them. Her brother leaves for the army after her 15th birthday. And now her Grandmother dies and the house is destroyed! Wait a minute, we fit in there don't we? We left, we never said goodbye, and we never saw her again. We left her. Us. Her best friends, her older brothers, made her life that much harder.

I turn to Logan. He still is looking at the floor, tears threatening to spill. I know, because mine a blurry too." WE left her Logan, what have we done?" This settled in their minds until they looked shocked. I couldn't hold them anymore, tears started pouring down my face. "We - we hurt Taylor?" Carlos whimpered, tears coming down his eyes too. Logan put a hand on his shoulder, and nodded sadly. Tears threatening to spill. WE all looked at each other, deeply ashamed. But Katie wasn't done with us. She continued to glare at us, tears pouring down her face as a waterfall.

"See! That's why I didn't want to leave Minnesota! I didn't want to leave Taylor! All those scams to get money? To buy them a plane ticket here! I hate us for leaving her! Alone, and now look what's happened! She has nowhere else to go! Her life is hanging by a string! And now that she's coming here, she'll probably resent us for leaving her! Did any of you even say goodbye? No, you didn't! Are you happy now? Big Time Rush! You left your best friend, who really needed you, to be famous! How could you do that! Your all heartless-" She was cut of by Mom shouting "Katie! That's enough you've given the boy enough of a beating." Katie protested " No I Haven't! They don't know what they've done!"

"Katie…" Mom started. She was cut off by Logan. "No, it's alright Mrs. Knight, we deserve it." We all nodded in agreement. Logan stood up, new determination in his eyes. " I would give up all of this to have Taylor happy and with us again." James and I both stood with him. "All of it." I agreed firmly. James nodded. Carlos who finally looked up from crying, bounced to his feet. " So it's decided, we do whatever we can to make it up to Tay-Tay! Carlos said. Katie glared again. "You better! Understand?" We all nodded. "Understood." We huddle up. "For Taylor!" I shout. They echo: "**For Taylor!**"

_**Hope you enjoyed!**_


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey everyone, sorry it's taken a while, but this is worth it trust me!**

**Warning Emotional Lash Out (lots of tears) Tay and the Boys are reunited! Yay!**

**Really Long chapter, hope you like!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush….. "Sigh"…Sadly.**

**Enjoy! Review and get a virtual cookie! ****J**

**Chapter 4 Reunited**

_**Taylor's Pov:**_

Lucy and I stepped out of the cab. Oh boy. Lucy's eyes popped out of her head. "THIS is where the guys have been living for the past year?" I nod slowly. This place was impressive. I sighed and looked down. I was wearing some cheap goodwill clothes. All of our belongings were destroyed in the fire. I was in worn down boot cut jeans, and a Minnesota hockey sweatshirt. The sweatshirt was a going away present from my best girlfriends back in Minnesota. I'm going to miss them. Some small tears come to my eyes, I left them. But I can't think about that now. On with the personal description! I also had on gloves; I had major burns on my hands. And I didn't want any questions about them. The burns on my face were harder to hide. Lucy helped pay for a scarf, big sunglasses, and a hat that created a shadow over my face. This is the best I can do for right now. It's not going to last. Five minutes in California and I'm already sweating.

We walked through the door. Oh thank goodness, there's nobody here. Good, no questions and no whispers. We went up to the front desk. "Hello, I'm Taylor Bell and this is my sister Lucy. WE will be living with the residents in 2j." The manager glared at me. I glanced down at his name, Mr. Bitters. Figures. "So you're the ones who are moving in with those hockey heads." I giggled. "That would be the boys. We both come from Minnesota." Mr. Bitters just scoffed "I really don't care. Elevators over there. Have a Palm Woods day!" He waved and disappeared under his desk. Lucy just stared. "Okay, weird much?" I shrugged and said "Let's go." Lucy squealed and jumped around. "Yay. Yay, Yay!" I rolled my eyes. Even though on the inside I was doing the same thing. "Jeez, come on Luce." I walked into the elevator, Lucy hopped in after me. It was silence in the elevator, both of our minds doing little happy dances in our heads. We walked out, and kept walking until we got to 2j. I took a deep breath, glanced at Lucy and rang the doorbell.

_**Kendall's Pov:**_

It was really late a night. We knew that Tay and Lucy would come late, but not this late. Did something happen? Could something have gone? My rambling was cut short by the doorbell. I started for the door but was stopped by Katie. I looked down at her, confused. She just shushed me and pointed at the door. Mom opened it. She gasped and pulled the figure into a hug, which the person gratefully returned. "Oh I missed you, Mama Knight." The person muttered. A younger girl I recognized as Lucy walked past them. Katie screeched "Lucy!" And ran to hug her. Mom and the figure separated. The figure was a girl. That was obvious. She was wearing old jeans and a baggy Minnesota sweatshirt. She had a shadow on her face because of sunglasses, scarf and a hat so I couldn't see her face. But I knew it was Taylor. It had to be her. It hurt to see her cling to my mom like that. It reminded me of how she would hug me. Tay turned to us. She took of the scarf, then the hat. She slid off the glasses. I saw her eyes first. Her brilliant green eye stared at me. They held so much emotion, excitement, sadness, fear, hurt, and a loving gaze, that made you want to know her. Then I noticed her face. Oh my god. What happened to her? This can't be the same Taylor, but it was. She smiled sheepishly at us. "Hey guys." Katie squealed and ran at her. Katie tackled her to the ground screaming "Tay-Tay!" We all started laughing, including Taylor. "Hey Katie, long tome no see." Taylor managed to get out between laughs. Katie hopped off of her. "Sorry Tay, I just really missed you" "no harm. No foul Katie. I missed you too, little sister." **A/N (AWWW!) **Taylor said with a few tears in her eyes. She started to turn towards us. I glanced at the boys for the first time. They seemed as frozen as I was. Logan had a few tears in his eyes from the sight of her burns and pain. James just stared at her. Carlos had a huge grin on his face. He was the first to be free from her spell.

He screamed "TAY OH MY GOD I MISSED YOU!" Carlos enveloped her in a huge hug that could have suffocated her. James chuckled softly and Logan smiled. I grinned widely. Carlos finally let go and James enveloped her in a hug she gladly returned. Logan was next. He smiled at her. And in response she flung her arms around him. Logan started to chuckle as he hugged her back just as tightly. She released him and began to walk towards me. I gulped, it was my turn. How would she react to me? She looked up at me and grinned. I instantly grin back and hugged her tightly. "Missed ya Tay." I whisper softly. "Missed youKenny." She whispered back just as softly. (A/N Taylor gives nicknames to everyone, so look out for them!) Mom smiled at us. Katie grinned and gave me thumbs up. We released each other. Taylor had tears in her eyes. Lucy hugged each of us and then Tay, who had more tears in her eyes. "It's okay Taylor, we're home now right?" Taylor looked up at Mom with a question in her eyes. "Of course Taylor, you can always stay with us." The boys, Katie, mom and I smiled warmly at them.

"Thanks, I don't know what we would have done without you." James looked at them confused. "What do you mean?" We looked at Tay. She looked a little trapped. As did Lucy. They looked at each other. Lucy nodded at Taylor. Tay took a deep breath ad said to us in a low voice. "You might want to sit down; I'll tell you the whole truth." She took a deep breath. We all sat. She sat on the couch next to me, Lucy by James.

"When I was ten, Mom died, as you know. That hurt as you can expect. But what hurt more was when Dad became abusive. I told Kendall that he hurt Lucy, but I left out the fact that he hurt me and blamed me twice as much. Those bruises and cuts you found weren't from field hockey Kenny, they were from him." I tensed and stared, shocked, at her. As did the others. She had a few tears in her eyes. She gulped and looked down and proceeded to talk, her voice shaking. "He left four years later. We were put under Trevor's care. He was upset that he let our father do that to us. He saw it happen, but could do nothing. So he waited until I was 15 and more stable, or at least enough to look after Lucy, before he left for the army. He wanted to help the people that he could. I don't blame him, I would've wanted out too." She laughed darkly. "We went under Grandma's care then. She didn't want us there and left frequently. Leaving us alone. I basically managed the house. She was asleep upstairs when I was cooking dinner. Lucy was asleep on the couch. Then the fire started." She started breathing rabidly, tears threatening to spill over. "I left the stove unattended for 2 minutes and it burs into flames! I almost killed us! Of course, I managed to kill Grandma! Drove Dad away! Trevor's not coming any time soon! Mommy's GONE! And now LUCY is drifting away from me. I'm a mess! Now I'm here! They were going to split us up! Or they would put us with him! I ruin everything! I shouldn't have come here! I mean, you left right? I should've stayed gone. Lucy can stay, she deserves that. I'll go live with him again. I guess I deserve it! I'm going to ruin everything! She was sobbing while she wailed. "I'm…..so….so …sorry! She cried and finally disappeared into her tears.

We stared shocked. She seriously thought that she was entirely at fault? That's ridiculous! I look over at Lucy. She had silent tears running down her cheeks. James put an arm around her. I put a hand on Taylor's shoulder.

She cringed.

And it didn't go unnoticed. Carlos, Katie and Mom gasped. Logan looked at Lucy. "That bad?" He whispered. Lucy nodded and flung herself into Tay's arms. They clung to each other and cried. Mom chocked back a sob and looked at us. How did we miss this all those years? WE helped her reach this state! WE weren't there for her when she needed us! "No, "I spoke calmly, so calmly I scared myself. " We're sorry Tay, We should have noticed. We should have been there for you and Lucy. It's not your fault at all." I said. The others nodded. "We're sorry Tay!" Carlos cried. Tay wasn't sobbing anymore but there was tears still gushing down her face. "Aww, come here Carlitos." Taylor choked out, her arms wide. They hugged tightly. "You too," she said to James and Logan. They gratefully joined the hug. "Come here, Kenny." I heard a voice come out of the huddle, a little muffled. So then I joined the huge hug. I heard Lucy. "You too, Katie and Mama Knight." And then we were all together. Our little makeshift family. Together at last.

**AWWWWWWWWW!**

**Come on that was cute, a loving family moment.**

**Hope you enjoyed!**

**Review and you get a virtual cookie!**

**(WITH SPRINKLES!)**

**Bit of Slytherin out! Peace! BYE!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry I haven't updated as fast as I said I would.**

**Forgive me!**

**If you forgive me I will give you a virtual cookie.**

**(Jeez, I'm giving out a lot of those aren't I?)**

**Oh well! I love virtual cookies!**

**In fact- Me encanta Los cookies de virtuales!)**

**Ha-ha I can speak Spanish!**

**WARNING JO BASHING! (YAY!)**

**Enjoy! (I own nothing!)**

**Chapter 5 The palm woods pool**

**Taylor's Pov**

Lucy slept with Katie in her room and I slept on the couch. Everyone protested, but I insisted. I was fine. I had my boys back, Lucy and I had a little sister. And we had a mom. Everything was good. But then the morning came. I woke up cursing the sun. But that was normal. After that I was happy. I was a semi- good start I guess.

I look over at the clock; it was five in the morning. No one would be up now. I collapsed back on the couch. I was exhausted. My emotional breakdown took a lot out of me. Then the sound of footsteps hit my ear. I look at the time. 6:00 AM. Huh, I guess I was lost in thought. I turn and see Lucy shuffling towards me. I smile and stand up to hug her. "I'm not dreaming?" she asks half asleep. I laugh. "No Luce, you're not dreaming, Welcome home." I sigh as Lucy relaxes into my arms.

"You are Home."

I jump. I look over Lucy to see Mrs. Knight. She smiles warmly at us and the reality of her words hit me. We have a home, a real family. We are wanted, and loved. Our lives can start again. I return the smile and release Lucy from my hug. I greet her warmly, as does Lucy.

Not long after Mama Knight starts breakfast, Logan comes stumbling out. He grins at me. I smile back. "You always were the first one up." He gives a small laugh in return. "And you were always the last, why are you up so early?" The questions begin. I give a small smile. "I guess I was used to waking up early to do chores." He looks at me confused. "Grams was nothing but our legal guardian. S of course she didn't do the housework." He smiles sadly at me. "Oh" I just shrug. "No point in fussing over it. What's done is done."

Soon James joins us followed by Kendall. They both give me monster hugs, Logan had to pull them off of me. Finally Carlos lumbers out. Sit at the table, and promptly collapses on the table. We stare at him. I shrug (A/N she does that a lot doesn't her?) "He never was much of a morning person, and besides its Carlos." Kendall, Logan and James just look at me. "What?" I ask. They answer together. "Nothing, we just missed you." (A/N AWWWWWW! Come on that's sweet! I'm done now, carry on!) I smile at them, tears coming to my eyes. Katie walks out. Sees my watery eyes and turns to glare at the boys. "What did you do now?"

Carlos jumps up. "Nothing! We were just being sweet and thus brought tears of Joy!" We look at him; he looks down at us (he's on the table). We burst out laughing. "Pretty much yeah. Good Morning Katie" I say between laughs. Katie calms done enough to say. "Good Morning to you too Tay, and to you Lucy." We all burst out laughing again, a certain Latino fell off the table.

We all collapse in our chairs breathing heavily. Katie sighs "Where's the food, I'm starving!" I laugh at her impatience. "In the kitchen. Your lovely mother is cooking it." I say and go back to setting the table, humming softly. "What are you humming?" Kendall asks. I blush and say sheepishly. "City is Ours." James raises his eyebrows. "You're a fan?" I sigh. "No duh, you guys are my best friends, how could I not be?" They grinned at me. I laughed. "Breakfast is served!" Mama Knight shouts. I cheer as did the others. We dug in. "Oh my goodness." I mumble, "I missed your cooking. I never was much of a cook." Lucy scoffed. "Don't I know it.' I glare at her and flick a piece of bacon at her. The whole table laughs. "Ok, I'll admit it, I'm a terrible cook!" Lucy cheers "Hallelujah!"

_Time lapse- 1 hour_

"Do you guys really have to go?" I whine. The guys look apologetic. "We're sorry Tay-Tay." James said. "But Gustavo will rip us apart if we don't show." They nod sadly. I frown. "Oh well, go to the studio then. I'll see you when you get back." They nod but hesitate. "Go on! I'll be here when you get back, ok?" they nod and slowly make their way out the door. I turn to Lucy and Katie, "Little help?" They nod and Katie cackles. Then as a combined force, we shove them out the door. I slam the door in the faces. "Go to the studio! I mean it! Make me a new song!" I hear mumbling on the other side, and then shuffling. I laugh but stop. I rush to reopen the door.

They look blankly at me. "Oh who am I kidding, come here!" I say my arms open wide. They laugh and drag me out into the hallway, and proceed to crush me to death. "Guys! Too much love!" They release me and grin they're infamous grin. "Aww you guys love me that much?" I smile. James grin gets bigger. "Yeah pretty much. Bye Tay- Tay!" "Bye BTR!" And with that I run into the apartment to get ready.

Jo's Pov (A/N warning Jo Bashing! I personally hate Jo, not only is she not worthy of Kendall, she not even that good of an actress! I Hate Jo!)

I watch the sickening moment from the stairs. Did they get the script from a Halmark Commercial? God, they act like she's perfect. I mean look at her! She practically screams freak!(A/N GRRRRRRRR…) Why would Kendall hang out with her? I thought he would have better taste. He dated me right? (A/N you would say that, witch!) Kendall made a huge mistake breaking up with me. I didn't cheat on him. Okay so maybe I did. But, Kendall hadn't taken me on a date in like two weeks. Just that one-minute date. Goodness that was a lame idea (A/N I thought it was cute!) he actually thought it would make up for ignoring me. Honestly, it takes more than that. But still, he is the hottest singer here, so I have to have him back. (A/N of course you little unfaithful…) But it seems that this freak is going to get in my way. And I can't have that. My relationship status is at stake! I need to have a little talk with Jennifers. (A/N Cue the evil witch laughter!)

Taylor's Pov

I rushed into the apartment. Lucy was by my side in an instant. "Can we go to the pool? Can we? Can we? Please! Please! PLEASE! Can we…" I covered her mouth with my hand. "Shh, calm down, ask Katie to come with us." She looked at me. "You're okay with going outside?" I shrug. "I'm going to have to see them sooner or later. Why wait?" She smiles at me and starts jumping up stairs. "Katie! Katie!" I laugh and go to change/

I sigh at my reflection in the mirror. I'm wearing simple jean shorts with purple flip flops. I also have a simple purple tank on over a bright green bikini top. My brown is in a simple braid down my back. It's a simple look. Very revealing for me. I take a deep breath, and walk out of the bedroom.

Lucy grins at me, Katie just stare with tears in her eyes. I look at her. "Just leave it Katie, I can't handle more tears." Katie takes a deep breath and nods a new smile on her face. "Okay, let's go swimming!" Lucy cheers. "Yes! We haven't gone swimming in ages, have we sis?" "No we haven't little sis, but I bet we are going to be doing a lot of it." Katie Laughs. "You bet you are." "To the pool!" I shout and we rush towards the door.

Lucy and Katie rush forward and cannonball into the pool. I laugh but linger outside the semi closed door. Oh god, how will they react? Easy Taylor, just act like you don't notice and they won't notice. Dang it, I sound like a self help book. I take a deep breath and plaster a smile on my face. It even feels fake! Ugh! I just got to take the bull by the horns, right? Goodness, I look like an idiot right now. I better just go in. I breathe deeply and walk through the doors. One foot in front of another, just make it to the chair and you can stick your face in a book. Just keep walking. One more step and… "Who are you?" Dang it! So close! "Uhh, Taylor." I turn and see three girls and instantly new they were snobby. You would just know. These girls do not want to make friendship bracelets. "Well, Taylor are you new here?" "Well yeah, I'm living in 2j with my sister." They raise their eyebrows. "You're leaving with Big Time Rush?" Yeah you know them?" They scoff. "No duh, they're only the most popular guys here, besides us of course." Another Jennifer spoke up. "Any ways why are you with the guys?" "I'm their friend from Minnesota, we grew up together." Okay right, they probably only hang out with you out of sympathy." What? Sympathy? No, the guys love me right? They told me this morning. "What do you mean sympathy?" We mean, look at you, you're a freak! They only hang with you because they feel sorry for you." "That…Can't be….True" "Well let's see, obvious troubled part, freak-like appearance, and you're a fan of Big Time Rush. Yep, it all checks out, you a paparazzi sympathy publicity act." "That's not true!" "Well you'll never know until they drop you for another sympathy freak." That can't be true, can it? No the guys wouldn't do that to me. They wouldn't leave me again? Would they? "Why are you telling me this?" I whisper keeping tears from falling. "We just thought you deserved the truth. It seems you've been lied to a lot." They couldn't have lied right? They wouldn't lie to me. "Why would they lie to me?" They just looked at me with no emotion, "Like we said, publicity, our publishers wanted us to do it, why wouldn't theirs?" That was it, I couldn't stand it anymore. I couldn't take the hurt. "Thank you….for showing me the…truth." I whisper.

And I turn and run the heck out of there. I hear shouts of protests behind me, but no one follows. Smart people; leave me alone with my tears.

**Hope you enjoyed!**

**There aren't going to be many Jo point of views, I almost broke my computer writing it. I repeat I HATE JO! Sorry about all the Author's notes, I just needed to get my anger out.**

**Review and receive a virtual cookie!**

**Bit of Slytherin out! Peace! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey sorry I haven't updated in a while, I've had kinda a bock from school, finishing work before vacation and all, but I found the time so here is chapter six!**

**I don't own Big Time Rush ****L**

**Chapter 6 they were always there?**

**Camille's pov **

That poor girl. She's obviously been through some tough times. And for the Jennifers to take advantage of that is just despicable. I turn away from the door to see Jo shuffling towards the back of a tent. I slowly walk towards her. "Nice job girls, did you see her face?" What is she talking about? I hear giggling but can't find the source. "She looked totally pathetic." One of the giggling voices answered followed by another two, "Totally!" I gasp, The Jennifers? Jo planned the entire thing didn't she? Well I guess I can't be too surprised. She's been shallow ever since she and Kendall broke up. But still for her to do something like that is just mean. I'm about to go all crazy actress on her. I take a deep breath about to scream at them, when I hear some shouts of "Taylor!" I turn, Jo momentarily forgotten, and see Katie with another new girl looking towards the door, Katie with a few tears in her eyes.

"Katie?" I ask her. "Who was that?" She turns towards me. As does the new girl. She whispers into Katie's ear. Katie smiles at me. "Camille is cool, she can help us out. And become someone you two can rely on, okay?" The new girl hesitantly nods and looks at me. I smile but it fades as I look at Katie. "Umm, Katie? Who was that?" I ask again, completely confused. "That was Taylor, Lucy's sister, my figurative sister, and BTR's best friend from Minnesota." So the new girl was Taylor, and her sister is with Katie. Okay. "The Jennifer's just convinced her that she is a freak, which she's not!" I frown. "Poor girl, anything I can do?" I wanted to help. Not out of sympathy, it just I wanted to show her that she could fit in here. And she could use a friend, that's a girl her age. "Could you find her? She might talk to you, since she doesn't know you. And if it's possible could you be her friend?" Lucy begged me. "She probably won't listen to me or Katie. The boys might have a chance but they're at work and can't help." I salute. "It's as good as done." I start for the door. "She's going to yell at you!" Katie yells at me. I laugh. "I'm an actress, I deal with drama everyday!" And with that I'm off after Taylor.

I find her on the roof.

Right where Kendall always is. He says that it's his place to think. Well, she doesn't seem anything but normal. I walk closer to her. Finally I hear a sound. She's sobbing, her whole body shaking. It was one of those heart clenching sobs that you know they poor their whole sadness into. It hurt to be near her. I walk closer and sit down, slowly, next to her. She tenses but keeps sobbing. Her eyes are red and blotchy. That's all I really see of her face before she turns away from me. "What do you want?" she chokes out. "I'm Camille, your sisters sent me." I speak slowly. She scoffs. "What do you really want? To make fun of me, to call me a freak?" I blink in surprise. "That's not my intention at all, what gave you that idea?" She whips around. Letting me see her full face. She's pretty, no doubt about it. But you have to look on the inside to see her true beauty. But I guess no one looks that closely. For what they've been saying about her. She's just misunderstood. And then I look at the big picture of her burns. She doesn't look like a freak. But that doesn't stop me from gasping. She glares at me taking it the wrong way. "See, I'm a freak. I guess you didn't really know about me when you followed me did you?" I stare at her. "You're not a freak." I tell her simply. But she laughs. "Of course I am, I'm the perfect sympathy act to get Big time rush more publicity." I sigh and frown at her. "Does this have anything to do with what the Jennifers told you?" She glances at me, tears still in her eyes. "Who?" "The Jennifers, the girls you where talking to." She frowns. "They told me the truth, the truth I was to naïve to notice." I stare at her. "And that truth is..?" The tears start again. "That my boys lied to me. That I truly lost them when they left me. I completely lost them. But why care about the freak? I understand now. They didn't need me so they left." She collapses on the ground and begins to sob again. I pulled her into a hug. This poor girl. "Shh, the guys wouldn't do that to you. Their not liars. They love you." She sniffed and looked up at me. Silent tears still in her eyes.

"How do you now?"

I smile. "They wouldn't shut up about you when they got your phone call. Even slapped all of them repeatedly. I learned about you guys' childhood together. I don't now the whole story nor do I expect to be told. But I do know that I want to be your friend Taylor, and help make you a little bit more happy." She sighed and managed a small smile. "Well if you want to be my friend you need to know the whole story, and it's Tay by the way." (A/N OMG that rhymed!)

**Kendall pov**

That was exhausting! Three hours of vocals? Two hours of Dance rehearsals? Equal one unhappy boy band. We walk out to the pool. Where Katie, Luce and Tay should be. Well, there's Lucy and Katie but where's Taylor? I voice my concerns aloud. "Where's Tay-Tay?" I hear a laugh behind me. "That freak? Probably hiding her face and crying. She deserved it. She showed her face to all of us. She didn't even know she was just part of a hoax to get you guys more publicity. Pathetic." WE turn to see the Jennifers giggling uncontrollably. We stare at them.

"WHAT?"

This isn't good.

**Oh Kendall, you have no idea. **

**Review please!**

**Oh and Santa ate all of my cookies so I can't give out cookies to reviewers. I'll give an I owe you kk?**

**Hope you enjoyed!**

**Bit of Slytherin out PEACE! **


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi I'm back! I've had some minor writers block but it's been solved.**

**So now I can post this new chapter!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Big time Rush ****L**

Kendall's pov

"What?" We all screamed. I was officially freaked out. This was bad. We really shouldn't have left for work. Even if we were fired it would have been fine as long as Taylor wasn't hurt. "Where is she?" The Jennifers shrugged. "She ran off. We have no idea where she is. Good riddance I say." The other Jennifers agree with her. I saw Logan fuming in the corner of my sight. But I didn't really pay attention I was keeping myself from seeing red. These girls knew nothing! I kept silently fuming until I saw Katie and Lucy looking miserable at a table. I run over to them as fast as I can, hoping to leave the Jennifers in the dust. No luck. They follow me, oblivious to the glares all of us were giving them. "Katie, Where's Tay?" Katie looks at me, a few tears in her eyes. Uh oh, this isn't good. "I don't know! She ran off crying!" Her eyes became mistier with tears. "She thinks she's a freak Kendall!" We all frown. Except the Jennifers of course. I hear them behind me. "She IS a freak." Carlos and James turn around to glare at them. "No she's not! She's Tay-Tay!" They just roll their eyes. I look at Katie again. "Did you do anything to help her?" I ask desperately. She answers in the same tone. "I sent Camille after her. I thought she would have better luck than us. Was that the right thing to do Kendall? I didn't know what to do! I just went with my gut. I messed up didn't I? I should have gone after her! I should have-" She was cut of by Logan. "Katie, chill. What you did was probably the best solution. You did just fine ok? Calm down." Katie took a deep breath and nodded. Lucy finally spoke up. "But we need to find her!" Then something clicked in my head. And my leadership kicked in. "Okay Katie, Lucy, and Logan look in the apartment. James and Carlos look around the park. I have a hunch where she'll be." We salute and run off.

I tore across the hall. Knocking down many people over, you have no idea how many people threatened to sue. Finally I get to the stairs. I take them two at a time. Right before I reach the door, I trip. And fall flat on my face. I go to get up but something stops me. I press my ear to the door. My hunch was right. It's muffled crying. Tay is on the roof, sobbing her heart out. "I'm a freak!" Anger started to fill me. How dare someone turn my Tay into this? I mean OUR Taylor, She's not mine. What was that Kendall? Start thinking straight. "Shh, shh, you're not a freak." I sigh out of relief. Camille found her and comforting her. Wait why am I still out here? I should be the one comforting her. I send a quick text to the rest of the band. _Found her, Roof, she's crying L _I hit send and open the door. It's just as I thought. Tay is on the ground sobbing. Her face is red and blotchy. She's shaking. The sight shakes my heart. Camille is next to her, also trying not to cry. I guess she got Tay to talk. I start to walk towards them. Camille looks up. Taylor doesn't seem to notice my presence. I sit down. I look over her to mouth to Camille, "What happened?" Camille looked at me and frowned. "I think she should tell you" Camille said out loud. Tay let out a whimper and finally looked up. She looked at me, shook her head and let her head fall again. I couldn't stand it anymore. I hugged her tightly. She relaxed, tears still pouring down her face. Then she tensed and pushed me away. She was shaking her head. "Why" She asked.

**Taylor's Pov **

"Why?" I had to ask. He blinked at me. "What?" He tries to come closer. I take one step back. "Why lie? Why pull me along?" He just gaped at me. "When did we lie to you?" Of course, he's playing dumb. I had to come out a say it. No matter how much it hurts. "Why did you use me for publicity, as a sympathy act? You only took me in to help your band right? I'm a freak and I have no right to be here without giving you something in return." I choke back a sob. This is where I'm the most vulnerable. Where I hug him or break down. "What are you talking about? You're anything but a freak. You're my best friend and little sister. I love you as does Logan, Carlos, and James. Katie would kill us if we did that to you, followed quickly by mom. And last I checked none of us want to be killed twice." I look at him. He sounds so convincing; I want to believe him so bad. But a lot of facts are against him. I need more proof. I turn to Camille. She looks uncomfortable with this situation. I don't blame her. "Camille, could you go find the other boys? I want to talk to them all together." She seemed hesitant. "Please Camille; there are some questions I need to ask Kendall alone." Camille frowned but nodded. Obviously not liking the fact that she's leaving me alone. She looked at Kendall. "You hurt her, I break you." (A/N Go Camille!) She turns from me, hugs me and leaves the roof.

I sigh and sit, Kendall follows my lead. We sit in silence for awhile until I break it. "Do you think I'm a freak Kenny?" I ask again. "Of course you're not, why are you thinking this way?" I shrug and turn away from him. "I guess those girls told me the truth." "And that is..?" I sigh and continue. "I don't belong here. This will never be my home. This isn't a place for me." I turn back to him. He's frowning. He puts a hand on my shoulder. I couldn't help it, I flinch. That always happens when I feel too vulnerable. Kendall doesn't back down. "What are you talking about? You belong with us. Your family. Me, James, Carlitos, Logan, Lucy, my Mom, Katie. We all love you Tay, for you. No strings attached." He smiles at me, not grinning, just a small smile. The reality of his words hit me. This is my home. This is my family. I'm not alone. And I will never be hurt like that. I look at Kenny, a few tears in my eyes. "So that's the truth. I'm an idiot." He gives a small laugh. 'That may be true. But your perfect to us, and me." He blushes. I raise my eyebrows. "Aww shucks Kenny. You know just what to say. " I throw my arms around him. " No prob, Tay-Tay" I give a small smile into his shoulder. "I love you…guys." Kenny shakes with laughter. "Nice save Tay. You okay now?" I pull out of the hug and nod at him. He smiles back as a response. We sit in a comfortable silence. Which is of course broken by, guess who? A mini tornado.

Yep. The rest of Big Time Rush is here.

Oh boy.

**YAY! A new chapter! Kendall and Tay are so cute! Please review! Virtual cookies to all who review!**

**Bit of Slytherin out! PEACE!**


	8. Chapter 8

Hello Everyone! Yay! I have a chance to update!

Thanks to all who reviewed!

You guys are the best!

Please enjoy!

I don't know if I ever described Taylor but here is a short explanation.

Light brown hair, bright green eyes and she has a normal body structure, but she is really short, shorter than Carlos. So she is the small fry out of all of them. Adding to her little sister part of their lives.

Chapter 8

Taylor's Pov

Gosh, these guys are a handful. Of course, I'm one to talk. I just had a major emotional breakdown, didn't I? Well, I'm glad the boys and Camille have enough patience to handle me. I couldn't. Look how bad I messed myself up? Wait, okay, get that idea out of your head Taylor. Logie said positive right? Right. Stay positive. Phew.

After they stumbled through mine and Kenny's moment, they would not leave my side. They kept apologizing to me, hugging me, and doing things to make me laugh. Carlitos even drove a golf cart into the pool! With James in the cart, of course. And then Kendall just happened to fall in, and tackle Carlos. Me and the Loganator just laughed our butts off. My friends are weird. And I know what you're thinking. I did go back down to the pool. Everybody had already moved on to a new piece of news. Much to my relief. This teen CSI group might be canceled. Huh, the boys didn't seem worried, so I guess that's Hollywood, right? But the Palm wood citizens not paying attention to me didn't stop the boys over protectiveness. One of them wouldn't leave me alone. One would always have their arm around me. Or talking to me. Not letting anyone else even get close to me. Not that I really minded. Camille had to leave for an audition. I think it was Degrassi again. But it was just me and my boys for a good three hours until we went back to the apartment. There was a new bed put in the living room. Not sleeping on the couch anymore! After a few hours of a movie marathon, I finally fell asleep. On who's shoulder, I have no idea. All I know is I surrendered into the blackness of a dreamless sleep.

Or so I hoped.

Kendall's pov.

Jeez, what a day. I could collapse right now. But I can't because a certain small fry is currently asleep on my shoulder, snoring quietly. Everyone else left for bed. Logan looked at us and just shook his head with a smile on his face and left first. Carlos just stood up and stumbled off to bed, banging into the wall a few times. Ahh, Carlos. James was the last to go up. He grinned at me and winked. I just scrunched my eyebrows in confusion. He just chuckled softly, and left for his bedroom.

Tay started to squirm in my embrace. Yeah I had my arm around her. She looked cold. But she started to shake her head on my shoulder, muttering things. I tighten my hold on her, as her muttering got louder. I froze at what I heard. "No, No! Let go! Please! Don't hurt me…" She had a few tears coming down her face. She was breathing deeply. "Wait! Not Lucy, Please! No! Stop!" She started shuddering. I started shaking her. And whispering in her ear. "Tay! Wake up!" My voice got louder. "Wake up! It's just a dream. She was full on sobbing now. She's being haunted. And there was nothing I could do about it.

Taylor's pov

Inside the dream:

_The blackness started to clear. I heard a voice. "Taylor" I froze. No, No, No! I'm okay no! No, No, No! "Taylor, come here." I shook my head. This is not happening. A figure stepped out of the dark fog surrounding me. The tears began to come back. My Father looked down at me. "There you are, now why were you hiding?" I bit back a whimper. He is supposed to be gone! He left! "Now Taylor, talk to your daddy when he is speaking to you." I had tears down my cheeks by now. "I… wa…was … Hiding… From… You…" He smirked at me. "Well now, you should have thought that through, because now you have to be punished. "No! Don't …hurt me." I forced my voice to break through my shock. He frowned at me. "Well if you can't be punished whoever will take the punishment?" I gasped. His smirk grew on his face again. "Not Lucy! I will… Take … the harm." I whispered. I came closer to me. "That's what I wanted to hear." I gulped and closed my eyes. I learned that if I close my eyes and imagine my mother with me, his hits don't hit me hard. He slapped me across the face. More tears came to my eyes. Why did you have to leave Mother? I need you here, now. He started to kick my stomach. Each one earning a whimper from my mouth. I wasn't full out sobbing yet. I'm proud of myself. Blackness started to flood my vision of my mother. I started to cry out but a new voice stopped me. My body was hurting all over, but I used all my strength to hear the voice. "Taylor! Tay! Wake up! Please!" It sounded heartbroken. But this isn't a dream. This is my life. The darkness began to cloud my entire vision. I never went unconscious before! I can't now! Don't go black! I don't want to loose myself. _

Kendall's pov

It was getting worse. That was obvious. She needed to wake up, now. I stated to shake her harder. Talking to her louder. Pleading with her. "Taylor! Tay! Wake up! Please!" She started to squirm much more. She was pushing off my hands. Then suddenly her eyes flew open. She was gasping for air, she looked ready to collapse. She focused on me. She let out a whimper, and flung herself into my arms. I hugged her tightly. She was sobbing and shaking. I rubbed her back, telling her to take deep breaths. Once she calmed down, I looked at her. "You okay?" She shook her head. "It was him Kenny, He was hurting me again." she shuddered. "He said that if I didn't take it, he would hurt Lucy!" I shushed her and brought her into my arms again. "He can't hurt you anymore, trust me, trust us, trust your family." She nodded and breathed deeply. I leaned back so I could look at her. And got myself caught in her eyes. They were glistening with tears. But still shining brightly. I wipe some of the tears off her cheek with my thumb. "It's okay, trust me." She locked into my gaze, showing me with her eyes that she promises. She has always had that talent. You could always tell what she was thinking when you looked I her eyes. I got completely lost in them. And by some instinct that was not my own, I began to lean in. Coming closer to her lips with every second.

Wow! Kendall's making a move! I'm so proud of him! But what about Taylor? Will she welcome him with open arms? (or lips!) Or is she not ready for the relationship! Find out when I update again! Review please! I won't update if you don't.

Hahahahahahaha! I'm serious!

Peace! ~lol~(it's a tiny drowning man! I love English class!)


	9. Chapter 9 Fire

_Hello! Thank you to all who reviewed! I'm sorry for leaving it like that, but it had to be done! Don't hate me!_

_Enjoy_!

Chapter 9

Taylor's pov

Oh god, oh god. This isn't happening. I'm still asleep. And everything is not real. My mind is just more messed up than usual. Yeah, that's it. Just relax, and wake up. Oh, who am I kidding? This is a disaster! I can't choose now! My mind isn't stable enough to handle this. My life can't handle this! My heart can't handle this! I can't do this! Oh crap! While my mental freak out was going on, Kendall just got closer! His eyes are closed, so he can't see me. He can't see me flipping out. I'm about to collapse from hyperventilating.

Oh crap.

Just as he was about to close the gap between our lips, I panicked. I grabbed a pillow and stuck it in front of my face.

Ah, crap. He kissed the pillow.

I just rejected my best friend in the humiliating way possible, for both us. I took a few deep breaths and closed my eyes. I gulped and slowly lowered the pillow. His eyes were widened, in surprise or shock, or maybe both, I don't know. His mouth was in a firm line. Like he was upset. Crap. He slowly turned away from me. I gulped again. Crap, crap, crap! I just ruined my friendship with Kenny! I rub my shoulders self consciously, hugging myself. I opened my mouth but no sound came out. I gulped and tried again. "Oh, god, Kenny…I'm …so…sor-" He cut me off. "Don't be." I shake my head. How can he not see that it's my fault? "But I am sorry!" Kendall shakes his head at me. "No, I'm sorry Tay. I was out of line. I shouldn't have tried." I grab his arm. "This is my fault. If I could be, if I could just be-" He grabbed my hand and cut me off. "No, you're perfect Tay. You're beautiful, smart, funny, outgoing, strong, perfect. And honestly I could go on for days." He gave me a weak smile. I couldn't return it.

I frowned and pushed my face into the pillow. "I am sorry though. I made you kiss a pillow! I'm hopeless. I'm a mess. I'm sorry Kenny, but I just can't." Tears started to come back to my eyes as I took a shaky breath. Honestly, I thought they would come sooner. I brought my head up to face him. Kendall had a frown on his face; he was staring up at the ceiling. He was still upset. And who was responsible? Me. "I'm going for a walk." I whisper suddenly. Kendall looks down at me. He gave me a confused look. "Why?" I was hesitant to answer. "I need to…think." I lied. I needed to cry my eyes out. My life just went down the drain, again. I ran out of the apartment. He didn't follow.

I'm sorry Kenny.

Kendall's pov.

I'm an idiot. I was about to kiss her! Of course she pushed me away! And she even apologized for rejecting me. I'm an idiot! I chased her away. Katie is going to kill me. Followed by Mom, Camille, Carlos, James and Logan. I'm dead. God, why did I do that? She's still unstable! No doubt she's gone to cry somewhere. I call Camille. Most likely she's up rehearsing her lines. "Hello?" Sure enough she was up. "Camille can you go to the roof and check on Taylor?" There was a pause. "What the hell did you do Kendall Knight!" I winced. "Umm, that's not really important Camille, just find her and you can kick my butt later, okay?" She scoffed "I'll find her Knight, but I can guarantee that by noon tomorrow, you will be unable to dance for a month." I gulp. "Thanks Camille." She growled. "You better be thankful Knight." And the line went dead. Oh god. I'm dead.

_Five Days later-_

Taylor's pov

Well, that could have gone better. I say to my self. Ever since the whole Kendall fiasco, Camille hasn't left my side since. She growled at the waiter for talking to me a little too long.

She found me on the roof. Yep, crying my eyes out. I've been staying with her for the past few days. Camille had taken it upon herself to slap Kendall every day. This was my limit. She wanted to do so much more. No one has told the other boys. I just told them that I wasn't really comfortable downstairs alone, so I moved in with Camille. They try to make me spill everything at least five times a day.(When Camille is away) They are so frightened of her that they don't talk about it in front of her. Carlos tried to once and it took us four hours to find them and restrain Camille. I was honored. Whenever they start I just look at them and give them my puppy dog eyes. If that doesn't work, I beg. They usually give in.

But in more recent news, I haven't talked to Kendall in five days. All I had said to him the whole time was "Do you want pizza?" And he grunted in response. He was still upset.

And also our old friend Jenny Tinkler (Sp?) had come to stay at the palm woods. And due to a bet I lost, she was rooming with me and Camille. It wasn't a pretty two days. And she is staying for a week. Oh god help me.

As we walked back home we heard a crash behind us. I turned and instantly cracked up. Carlos was under Logan who was under James who was under Jenny. Jenny immediately said "Sorry!" The others groaned in response. Camille and I went to help them up. They all smiled at us. "Hey guys, I started "What are you doing?" Carlos got this big grin on his face. And he started jumping around. "Oh, Oh, Oh! I thought it would be a good idea to have a roller derby!" I looked behind the hyper Latino and the brains of the operation. Logan just shrugged and said. "It sounded like a good idea!" I laugh at the response. Although Logan was the smart one, he still was a boy and enjoyed crashing into things. I turn to Jamey. "And you Jamey? What about you hair?" He shrieked and pulled out his giant mirror, which was to large for his pocket. "Where to you keep that thing?" Camille voiced my thoughts. James just shrugged and put a finger to his lips. Camille and I share a look and burst out laughing. The boys smile down at us. I grab Jenny and pull her away. Camille follows us. Jenny blinked at me. "What did you do that for?" I grinned at her. "I had to get you four away from each other, you would have hurt someone" We all laughed.

_2 hours later_

I was with Jenny all alone in Camille's apartment. Camille had an audition and Jenny was blow drying and straitening my hair. After about 10 minutes, I leave for the bathroom. When I come back, Jenny is gone. There's a note on the chair. _Someone just called for me to come to the lobby. I won a prize! _I sigh. Of course, she would leave me for a prize. I walk to the kitchen to get a snack. As I was coming out with an apple, I smelled the smoke. I turn towards the curtain. The hairdryer was right next to it. Still plugged in and on full blast. The curtain was on fire. And I was frozen to the spot.

The apartment was on fire and I was stuck. Too terrified to do anything.

_Don't hurt me! I know his is an awful place to stop. But it had to be done!_

_Review if you want to figure out what happens!_

_I'm serious._

_Peace! Bit of Slytherin out! XD _


	10. Chapter 10

Hello! Don't hurt me! I know, instead of updating this, I publish a new story! Hahahaha…..please laugh with me! O.O

Ok, I know it's no laughing matter. Thank you to all who reviewed!

I don't own Big Time Rush.:(

Here's chapter 10!

Chapter 10

Kendall Pov

I'm a mess. Tay has been avoiding me for the past four days! Well, I've been avoiding her too. I slump in my chair and sigh. Logan looks up, noticing me. "What's up with you and Tay? You haven't spoken at all lately." I shrug. "Don't know" Carlos shakes his head. "No dude, you do know, what's up?" All three of them stare at me intently. I gulp. I'm good under pressure, but with all of them against me? Not so good. "Uh, well-um-you see, I may have….." They got closer leaning over me. "..tried to...um ..kiss her?"

They blink.

"WHAT!"

I flinch. Just as they stand up, to no doubt pummel me to the ground. Carlos comes crashing to the floor. A small blonde figure bounces up off of him. "Hey guys!" James helps Carlos up, and we turn to look at her. "Hey Jenny." She begins to walk away. I call after her. "Wait why are you here? Weren't you with Taylor? She smiles at me. "I was, but I got a text saying I won a prize!" Carlos jumps over. "What's the prize?" He asks excitedly. "I have no idea!" She squeals. "Help me find them? They should be around here somewhere." Just as we started to respond, the fire alarm went off.

People started screaming and running for the exit. I turn to the stairs. Tay should be here by now. She was a fast runner, she could have been down here in a minute. And yet I'm being pushed by James and Logan to get out, after standing in shock for three. I tug out of their hold and grab Jenny. "Where is Tay?" She stutters out. "My apartment, 4G. Oh god! I left the hair dryer on! Tay! Oh god Kendall! " But I can barely hear them. I'm off to save Tay. She has to be okay.

I dash towards the stairs. I burst through the door and make my way to 4G. I collide with someone on my way. I don't see who, but they're blond with big sunglasses. I don't have time to apologize, we both dash off in different directions. In a flash I'm at the door. There's smoke seeping through the cracks. The fire's spreading, fast. I smash through the door and instantly cough. I blink through the smog. There's a small figure shaking in a corner, where the flames have yet to hit. She's shaking hard, from fear or coughing I don't know. But one things for sure. I can't stand to see Tay like this.

She's scared, which makes me scared. The figure stops shaking and starts to slink towards the ground, I can only scream her name as she crashes to the floor in a heap. The smoke obscuring her from my view. I sprint towards her. _Dear god, Tay. Be okay. For me. Be okay._

Taylor pov

The flames grew quickly, but it was the smoke that hit me first. By some miracle, my feet responded to me and I ran in a random direction. I had to get away. Or the fire will take revenge on me for taking two victims from it. I slam into the wall, and shrink into god, it's over. I'm sorry Lucy. I'm sorry Kenny. I'm sorry Logie. I'm sorry Carlitos,I'm sorry Jamie. I'm sorry Mama Knight and Katie. Tears start coming to my eyes. I touch my eyes. Are they because of the smoke? Or because I can accept that no one is coming? The tears start running down my face as I try to hold back the sobs. I'm done for.

I started to pant and instantly regretted it. I started to hack. My lungs were full of the awful smog and the heat made me dizzy. Everywhere I looked it was a blur. I saw bright orange and gray. My ears started ringing. I hugged myself tightly and began coughing again. My vision starts to blur uncontrollably, and the edges start to turn black. I try to grab onto the strings of my consciousness. I know that if I collapse now, I'll probably never wake up.

I start to fight against the blackness. But my resolve starts to fall through. The smoke starts to take over and I lose control. I start to fall.

"TAYLOR!"

I try to lift my head to the horrified voice but it's to late. I can only send out a silent plea. _Please help me._

**Kendall's pov**

**I make it to her just after she falls to the floor. I pull her into my arms and check her breathing. It's slow and quiet, but its there. There's a crash in front of us and I pull Tay away from the constricting corner. We have more space, but we are no where near the door. I lift Taylor into my arms, bridal style and do a 360. I see a narrow but possible path to the door. The only problem is that there's flames everywhere.**** I can only hope to make it through. I look down at Tay. She still looks completely perfect, even covered in soot, week old burns and unconscious. I give a small smile that sets into what I hope, is a confident expression. I hold her tighter to me and I make a break for the door. I dodge some crashing beams and smash through the door, silently thanking the 10 years of hockey for letting me save Tay. ****I bust down the door and survey ****the damage done to the Palm woods. The entire hallway is full of smoke but the flames have yet to take over.**** Either way I have to get us out of here before I collapse as well.**** I lower my head to avoid at least some of the smoke and turn Tay so that what little breaths she takes aren't full of ****fumes. I start to make my way towards the stairs. Of course, Jenny picks a room on the top floor. Great. I finally make to the stairs. The smoke is slowly seeping in through the cracks under the door. Good, that means the smoke isn't completely overruling it, my lungs can have some peace. I can already hardly breathe. But, I'm not sure Tay's lungs can handle even a bit more smoke. I have to hurry.**

**I sprint down the stairs, my only thought is to get Tay to a hospital as soon as possible. I burst into the lobby, tripping over myself in the process. Luckily, James sees me as he drags Jenny away from the door. "Kendall!" Carlos and Logan turn to see us too. "Tay! Kendall!" Carlos and James run in and help drag us outside. Logan goes off to find the ambulance that just showed up. James looks down at Tay. "What happened?" I frown and say "She went unconscious just as I reached the apartment. She's breathing." He sighs in relief, "Thank god, Kendall" I nod and start coughing. Carlos frowns at me. "We have to get you to the hospital too." I go to protest but the paramedics come in and drag both of us to the ambulance.**

**I turn my head and see Tay on a stretcher. She's so still. I grab her hand. I don't let go until we reach the hospital.**

AWWWW! Kendall! SO SWEET! I'm sorry for not updating in forever, even though many of you reviewed. School just got in the way you know? It's so time consuming! And for any of you who like Harry Potter, check out my Luna Lovegood story, she's my hero!

I'll try to update more frequently now, don't worry! I won't leave you hanging again!

Read and review!

Peace!


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N I'm soooooooo sorry! Things just kept piling up, and I may have pushed this to the back of my brain!**

**Please forgive me!**

**I don't own Big Time rush 'sob'**

**Kendall Pov  
**

The fire was about a week ago. The damage was being repaired but it would take awhile. Jenny had left with her band. Tay was still in the hospital. She was unconscious for about 2 days. The whole while, she was on a breathing machine. I was in for about 3 days, I just had some scraps and scratches. I was coughing a little but it was not as bad as Tay , when she woke up. She was scheduled to leave today, and we were going to throw a welcome home party. Me, mom and Camille were going to pick her up. She hadn't left the hospital room in a week, she was going to be happy. I wasn't even sure she had stood up in the week. I was fidgeting in my seat. Mom looked over and smirked at me. "Kendall, you saw her just yesterday, what's up?" I rolled my eyes at her. "Mom, she was asleep that time, and she's getting out today, that's what." Camille laughed. "That's so true Kendall, it must have killed you to not talk to her yesterday." I widen my eyes at her. "Of course it killed me, how could it not?" Both girls turn their gaze at me. "Kendall..." My mom started, "are you really okay?" I sigh. "I-I don't know mom, how is she going to be alright?" Camille looked confused, "what do you mean? She is getting out today." I shake my head at her, "that's not it, mentally, emotionally, how?" Camille frowned, obviously upset at the new notion, then she nodded and gave me a small smile. "With us Kendall," she says calmly. Mom smiles at her, but I just stare in confusion. "What do you mean?" My mom speaks for her, "we will help her Kenny, she's with her family now. She'll be okay." I nod and slowly my lips turn up in a smile.

**Taylor's pov**

God this place is boring. I do nothing, they complain about me not sleeping, I do nothing, they complain about my whining, I sleep, I eat. Nothing happens! The only bright side to being in the hospital is the fact that I don't have to face the citizens of the palm woods. Not anymore. My brain is screaming at me to put a smile on my face, but my heart doesn't want to. I'm scared. I'm scared that I can't do this. I'm scared that I won't be able to live normally. I'm scared to be seen as a freak. I'm scared to be alone. I feel alone. I know Kenny saved me, and I'm so grateful. But was I meant to be saved? This is the second time fate has tried to kill me. Is it trying to tell me something? Oh God, what am I thinking? I was never alone, I was never alone, I was never alone!_ But you were in the fire. _Tears began to prick my eyes as my brain absorb this new information. I was alone, but then I wasn't apparently. I went unconscious before I could see him, but I could feel Kendall's hand as he held mine. He was there, he was with me. He saved me. A small smile appeared on my face. And I'm sure any one of my boys would do the same. I have a family again. Happy tears found their way on my cheeks. Then I began to laugh. I was imagining the party they had planned. Since James was in charge, he would most definitely get out of control. I heard about the party kings of Hollywood. That must have been terrifying for the others. Carlos would most likely trow himself of the roof, just to get me laughing. And there would be Logie finding the exact measurements of the trampoline and scolding Carlos if he went too high. Camille would be laughing next to him, at Carlos of course. And Kendall would be next to me. Laughing his head of, and giving a thumbs up to Carlos. Either that or he would throw me in the pool.

He really wouldn't want to do that.

I spent the last week in the hospital, acting like a sick carrot, doing nothing! I grew up with Carlos, Its hard for me to stand still! I begin to laugh and smile again. Flashes of our childhood came back to me. Laughing on the swing set. Me pushing Jamie off the slide so I could go. Stealing Carlos' helmet, and see how long he could go without noticing. Studying with Logie for a test coming up the next day. Me and Kendall destroying each other during a game. Me hugging all of them when they one the championship. Me cutting a snip off of Jamie's hair. All in all, I was a pretty adorable kid. With a little devil side, that made me even cuter. Which of course made them super protective of me. I remember my first date, they all threatened him. Even Logan, who is usually calm with stuff like that. My dad had already left so they stepped in. Then they followed us. I knew they did, so I made it very hard on them. I pulled out all the female tricks. Needless to say, it was a hard night on them. But in the end I hugged them. What can I say? They were being adorable. Even if it escalated as we got older. I miss those days. Sometimes I wish I could just turn back to the times where I could be carefree and at peace again. But I'm stuck here, and everything's changed.

**Kendall's pov**

We finally arrive at the hospital, only to find that Tay isn't in her bed. I, of course start to freak out. But I'm silenced by Camille calling me over to the window in the other room. And Tay's right there. Fully dressed, on the balcony, laughing and smiling her head off. It makes my heart starts racing just seeing her like this. It's just like the old days. She would always have a smile on her face, and now, well not so much. Camille calls her name**. **"Tay! You are supposed to be in bed!" She stares at Camille. "But Cami! I'm getting out of here today! You know that! I just got so bored, I decide to watch the clouds." I look up. Then stare at her. "Uhh, Tay? There are no clouds." She gives a snort and smirks at me. "I can see that, Ken doll. I just like the feel of the sun." I frown at her smirk. She knows how much I hate that nickname. I am so not like Barbie, I play hockey! She laughs and my frown. "You know I'm kidding, I wouldn't hang with you if you were like Ken." Camille holds back a snort but you can tell she wants to laugh. I'm surprised by loud laughter behind me. I turn to stare, shocked at my mom. She smiles shyly.** "**Hey guys, you found her, great!" I shake my head. "Your my mother! How can you laugh at me!" This time Camille doesn't hold back her laughter. Taylor joins her. I frown at all of them. Tay sees this at comes over to me. "Sorry Kenny, But your just so darn cute, we can't help it!" I start to blush as she hugs me. Camille starts snickering and gives me a thumbs up. I stick my tongue out at her. Tay pulls away from me, checks my face and smiles. "Well, now that Kendall's smiling again, I have to get to a party, don't I?"

**Okay, I know this is short. But I remembered about it and I started to type as fact as I could to give you guys another chapter. So I'll update next week or a couple days after that, it depends on how many reviews I get.**

**Next chapter is the party! Can anyone say DRAMA! **

**Oops I Wasn't supposed to say that. "Face palms" **

**Peace! and Review!  
**


	12. Chapter 12

**_Hello! Everybody! I updated on a Saturday, like I promised! Okay, I said I would update last Saturday, but something cam up! So I put a lot into this chapter!_**

**_Enjoy!_**

**_I don't own Big Time Rush. *Warning: Major Jo bashing!*  
_**

**Chapter 12**

** Taylor's Pov**

Well, this was a bit much. Even for the guys. They went way overboard. Why? You ask? Well that's see...

1. Almost everyone in the palm woods.( even Mr. Bitters, apparently he took a liking to me. Joy)

2. Every soda known to man

3. A full karaoke area, complete with stage.

4. A throne

5. Me IN the throne with a tiara.( A TIARA people!)

6. The boys waiting on me hand and foot

Well, I wasn't complaining about the last one. I was talking about the first, second and fifth. Me + people= bad situation. Carlos + soda= really bad situation. And me in a throne? Equals really mad Tay-Tay. And yet, here I am, on a throne, observing the party the guys made for me. I sigh, but smile, remembering how they convinced me to do this.

About an hour earlier...

"Come on Tay!" I growl at James. He flinches but stands his ground. Wow, he's really determined. Well, I can be just as stubborn. Logan pushes himself in the middle of us. "Okay, let's just calm down." I huff "tell that to them" Pointing to Kendall, Jamie, and Carlos. They push Logie out of the way and swarm me. "Please Tay!" "Come on Tay-Tay!" "Tay!" I stomped my foot. " No!" Logan sighs. " Just wear the Tiara." he pleads. I huff again. " No way in heck." They all sigh in defeat. They start to move away. Except for Carlos. He just looks at em and pouts. With puppy dog eyes. My harsh countenance softens than goes back full force. I blink hoping it goes unnoticed. James smirks. Crap. He whispers something to the others and they smirk at me. Including Logan. Traitor. They move slowly over to me. I gulp. They stop in a semi-circle and turn to me. They crouch down and look straight at me. All of their eyes widen and their bottom lips stuck out. Good God! They look at me with identical pouts and cow eyes. I'm done for. Crap.

Present Time

So here I am. Being blinded by strobe lights and I. The middle of everyone's attention. Exactly NOT where I wanted to be. People keep coming up to me but they move away when they see me. I don't blame them. I must be a sight for sore eyes. Carlos got very protective and started growling at people. I put a hand on his shoulder and smile weakly. " Where's Stephanie?" He blinks, confused. "The girl who you were totally crushing on " Carlos gave a shy smile. "Over there." I nod my approval. "She's pretty, just make sure she deserves you, Carlitos." I push him towards her direction. He turns to me. "What do you mean?" I smile. "You deserve someone special, who deserves you." He grins. "So do you Tay." And with that, he walks towards Stephanie. I blush and subconsciously turned towards Kenny. He turned to me, his eyebrows raised. I immediately turn away, my face burning. Okay, weird much? I don't like, like Kenny. I turned him down right? Right. Kendall is my brother, best friend and close ally, but not my boyfriend. I can't get a boyfriend, not for a long time. I took a deep breath and surveyed the party, or rather my party.

Logan was talking to a brunette, oh wait, that's Camille. Logan looks nervous. Huh, Lucky Girl. And there's James flirting with a huge group of girls. Oh, Jamie. I know he's self conscious, and many see him as a playboy. But he's sweet, kind, and caring. He just needs the right girl. I hope he finds her. And there's Kendall. He's just sitting at the edge on the pool, staring out into space. I started to walk towards him. Suddenly I was pulled back behind a tent. The hand was removed and I was spun around face to face with a blond. She had a snotty smirk and I instantly disliked her. She glowered at me and gave me a sneer. See? You just don't like her. She started to mutter something under her breath. I only caught a bit. "...what does he see in her?" I started to glare back. She smirked and stuck her finger in my face. "I don't care who you are. And I really don't give a damn" She flipped her hair. "But I'm Kendall's girlfriend. And he doesn't need a freak like you trailing him like a love-sick puppy." I blink, shock clear on my face. She smirks wider and continues. "Whatever Kendall says to says to you, it's out of pity. Honestly honey, are you blind? You can see it plainly. Of course, I've always been able to read him like a book." Tears prick my eyes as I shake my head. She laughs. "Believe it, Taylor. He feels nothing for you. He just gonna dump you back into foster care and leave you alone. Yep, I know your past cupcake. Then your sis is gonna figure out that your a freak and that your just dragging her down. And then? She'll dump your sorry ass and you'll be completely alone." She growls the last bit, throwing into my brain. I'm stiff and a tear breaks through my self control. She flicks the lone tear off my cheek, I flinch. "Good Luck with the rest of your life, Hun!" She saunters off, her hair whipping behind her.

* * *

**Kendall's Pov**

**The water feels nice. It's calm, its too cold to swim right now. Even L.A. it gets cold. The water doesn't stir, it's at peace and it glitters(A/N Love that word!) It reminds me of Tay in Minnesota. Then Carlos, most likely showing off to Stephanie, jumps into the pool. Followed by Stephanie. They both surface and Steph starts shivering. Carlos hugs her and they turn to each other. I sigh and smile. I turn my body away from them, giving them privacy. I get a brief flash of Tay running. Or I think it was Tay, it could just be another girl, heartbroken by James' senseless flirting. I turn to get a better look but run into a face. Jo. Ugh, she left me alone for a couple of weeks and now she's back. Fan-freaking-tastic. She has a triumphant smirk on her face, I know that smirk. I saw it on her face when she cheated on me. I didn't know it at the time but I knew now. She had done something, good or bad, I didn't know. But I was going to find out. She looked down at me. "Hey Kendall, need a towel?" She asked teasingly. I looked down at myself. I was soaking wet. I'll thank Carlos for that later. She handed me a towel, I dried my hair, but nothing else. She eyed me hungrily. I roll my eyes, She couldn't handle herself, could she? "What do you want Jo?" I asked impatiently. Her smile fell a bit but came back full force. "Whatever do you you mean Kenny?" I flinch. That was Tay's nickname for me, not Jo's. "That is not my name, it's Kendall." She frowns "But Taylor.." I cut her off. "You are not Taylor, you will never be what she is to me." Her face falls, and a scornful look passes her face. "I will be Kendall. Soon. Taylor won't be with you for long ." I step back in surprise. I wasn't expecting that. I look up to ask her what she meant, but she's gone. I head in the direction I saw the girl go. Was it Tay? What happened? As my words sunk in my steps became faster. I would find Tay. I will.**

**A/N Yay! Kendall! You go find Taylor! Before something bad happens! Whoops, wasn't supposed to let that one slip.**

**Sorry to anyone who likes Jo, but I despise her! Big Time Beach Party was the perfect time for them to break up! But Kendall had to be the cute, forever faithful boyfriend! Why can't they just breakup?**

**Anyway, Review please! They make me happy.**

**Peace!  
**


	13. Chapter 13

Hello everyone!

I forgot to tell all of you the meaning behind this story. It is to show that no matter what you've gone through those close to you can help and you can stay strong.

Sorry for not saying this! It might have explained some of Taylor's actions and thoughts. Sorry! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush, if I did me and Logan would be dating, I would run around with Carlos all day, Have Kendall for a best friend, James would be dressing me everyday, and Jo would be pushed into the pool and slapped every day! Why is life so cruel!

Taylor's pov,

I ran, sobbing. Questions leaked into my mind. _Why me? Why now? What's the point of torturing me to my limit? Why make fun of me? What did I do to deserve this? _This got me sobbing harder. I ran and ran until my legs began to collapse out from under me. I whipped at my eyes furiously. And my eyes cleared enough to see where exactly I was. The roof. I laughed sourly, 'I always come here don't I ?' The tears kept flowing down my face but I simply ignored them. What I was more concerned with was the pain in my head and heart. I gripped my head. Every sob brought the hammer down in my head. I was officially hyperventilating. I couldn't get air into my lungs and I felt extremely light headed. This combined with the dreadful pain and the slow cracking in my heart made me want to scream in agony.

I just want it to end. I just want it to be done! It felt like it was killing. I sent up a silent prayer. 'Please! Have mercy! Kill Me Now!' But it wouldn't come. The sweet thought of a quick death entered my mind. If the world wouldn't give me what I wanted, I would just have to do it myself. Why would the world help me? It's never paid attention to me before! It's never cared before! I stumble to my feet, and almost fall down again. I grit my teeth in concentration. I have to end this. I have to leave this life behind me. I send up another prayer. 'I wish to have a happy life next time please? Or at least, don't let me come back at all!' I stumble over to the side of the roof, and look down. It was a long drop. I smile darkly and step up. The wind blew my hair in my face. I gripped it between my fingers, and glare at it. It was tough and dry. It had no shine to it. More tears leak out of my eyes. I was hideous. Of course no one would listen to me! I wasn't worth listening to, i wasn't worth looking at, I wasn't worth believing in, I wasn't worth caring for. I took one step towards the edge. I didn't now much about suicide, but it seemed like this was the situation where you kill yourself. I didn't approve of suicide, but now i understand it. I didn't want to live this life. I was harming everyone around me. No one liked me, no one cared. They would all leave!

I looked up to the sky and spat at the happy go lucky clouds. I wanted to scream at them. I wanted to make them feel the pain I felt. I threw my fists in the air and screamed. "WHY!" i almost collapsed but i kept my footing. I didn't want to die yet. I still have to tell the world how pissed off I was. I went to open my mouth again but I began to cough. It began to rack my body and I couldn't hold on any more. I collapsed and fell face first on the cool brick. I turned my face and the tears fell against the brick. I started to crawl towards the edge. I was on the opposite side of the pool, and it was late. No one would see me if I simply fell over the side. I gave a sigh of relief. I could end it all, I could leave in peace. No one saw me leave, they are still down below, enjoying the party. I went to rub away the tears again only to find my hands dry. I laughed darkly, which turned into a tortured cough. I was out of tears. I couldn't cry anymore. 'About time.' I scolded myself harshly. I looked down again, saying silent goodbyes. I began moving slowly towards the edge. I had a huge grin on my face. I reached out, death was in my reach.

* * *

Kendall's pov

I ran my heart out. If I went any faster my legs wouldn't be connected from my body. I heard an agonized wail. It was high-pitched and cold. "WHY!" I shuddered and slowed down. I stopped completely shaking as the true meaning behind the scream hit me. 'Oh Tay, what are you doing?' I stumbled into a run again, and launched myself to the roof. SHe would be there, if she wasn't I don't know what I would do.

I stopped right outside the door, deja vu anyone? I remembered the awful look Taylor had on last time. I didn't want to look at that look ever again. But sadly I knew I would. I slowly opened the door and made my way towards the center of the roof. I didn't see Tay. I clenched my fist. 'What if I was wrong? What do I do now?' I began to turn back to the door, until I heard a cough. Followed by another pitiful cough followed by a dark chuckle. I shudder with fear and turn my head slightly. ANd I almost broke out in sobs myself. Tay was a mess. She was face down on the edge of the roof, her cheeks streaked with tears and her eyes puffed up and red. She was coughing, shaking her body throughly. SHe was moving ever so slowly over to the very tip of the ledge. SHe had a large smile on her face and she looked completely out of it. Her head was right over the side when i realized what she was doing. I gasped. She was trying to kill herself. I shook my head and rubbed my eyes. No, she couldn't be. Suicide? That wasn't the Taylor I know. But then again, not much of what she does is the Tay-Tay anymore. I know she's there, she's just buried deep. I open my eyes again. And gasp. She's lifted herself up on her elbows and was ever so slowly sliding over the edge. She was close enough that gravity would take over soon enough. She's far enough away that I couldn't reach her in time if I ran. I racked my brain for ideas. Then it hit me. That one night change our whole relationship. That song. I gave a sigh took a deep breath and sang my heart out. To hopefully reach her. To hopefully show her. That I need her, I love her. I long to protect her and I can't live without her. I send a silent prayer. 'Please Tay, Listen to our song.'

* * *

Tay's pov

The edge was coming closer and closer. The new adrenaline filled up my body and I found the strength to prop myself up on my elbows. I gave a sigh of relief. 'It would be over soon' I promised myself. 'Just wait a little longer Taylor' Just as I was about to give the final push I heard it.

_Looking at the pages of my life  
Faded memories of me and you_

My breath caught. Tears came back to my eyes. 'Huh, I guess I can still cry.' I went to wipe them away but stopped myself. I would listen. At least until the end of the song. THen I would leave the earth.

___Mistakes you know I've made a few_  
_I took some shots and fell from time to time_  
_Baby, you were there to pull me through_  
_We've been around the block a time or two_  
_I'm gonna lay it on the line_  
_Ask me how we've come this far_  
_The answer's written in my eyes_

I shook my head. It's effecting me to much! 'Why Kenny? Why did you have to remember this song! Why?' I began to shake, memories filling my head.

_Tears ran down my face as I sobbed. He had yelled so loud! He had said such mean things. He said that he didn't want me. Is that what Daddy's tell their daughters? I don't have the nerve to ask my teacher and Trev says not to talk about with friends. He's says they would leave me alone if I did. I don't want to not have friends. Kendall knew he would yell sometimes. But he didn't know what Daddy did when he was angry. He hit me. Not the playful hits Carlos loves to give us. He gives playful smacks and I just smile at him. Sometime I wish Carlos would teach Daddy how to hit people. Happy, the ones that say I'm happy to be here. That I accept who you are and I'm glad to be here, with you. I don't think anyone taught Daddy that. I asked Trevor once if anyone had. He just smiled and hugged me saying. "You just keep thinking that Tator- tot." I frown. I hated that nickname. But TRevor loved me, he never hurt me. He frequently helped me with math and the mean boys who pulled my pigtails. Along with my boys of course. I smile at the thought of them. I have them to look forward to. Btu then my smile turned into a sob. I remember what Daddy said. He said that they would leave. THat I wouldn't have any friends. I began hiccuping and tears gushed down my face. I hid my face in my pillow. I stayed there sobbing for a long time. I heard a soft voice humming soon after my tears left me. I looked up to see Kendall smiling softly at me. I try to smile back but end up choking. He rushes over to me. His humming stops and I look to him. "Don't stop..." I whimper out. He glances down at me. "What?" I smile, actually smile and his obliviousness. "Singing. Sing for me Kenny?" HE sighs and asks. "Will it help?" I smile and nod softly. He grins, teeth missing from his smile. "Okay Tay - Tay" He begins singing. _

Every time I look at you, baby, I see something new  
That takes me higher than before and makes me want you more  
I don't wanna sleep tonight, dreamin's just a waste of time  
When I look at what my life's been comin' to  
I'm all about lovin' you

_I smile and lean back, as he captures me in a hug. THat was the first night Kenny sang to me. He said that as long as I asked he would sing. For me, for my smile, for my laugh. I will always laugh for Kenny._

I look down. Remembering my promise to him. The ground looks so far away. wouldn't it hurt? I didn't want everyone to leave. But i was about to leave as well. Kendall's voice leaked through my thoughts. ANd i began to smile. Sure it was a tweak of the lips but it was the power of Kenny.

_I've lived, I've loved, I've lost, I've paid some dues, baby_  
_We've been to hell and back again_  
_Through it all you're always my best friend_  
_For all the words I didn't say and all the things I didn't do_  
_Tonight I'm gonna find a way_

I turn to Kendall. His eyes are closed. He looks so peaceful, and yet so sad. I gasp. Kendall stopped me from killing myself. He saw me ready to leave my life behind. 'Oh Kenny, I'm so sorry!' I stumble forward towards Kendall. he peeks through his lashes but closes them again. Content that I am no longer on the ledge. I lean against it, listening.

_Every time I look at you, baby, I see something new_  
_That takes me higher than before and makes me want you more_  
_I don't wanna sleep tonight, dreamin's just a waste of time_  
_When I look at what my life's been comin' to_  
_I'm all about lovin' you_

_You can take this world away_  
_You're everything I am_  
_Just read the lines upon my face_  
_I'm all about lovin' you_

I sigh and begin to smile, tears still running down my face. I'm happy. I got to scream at the world, I got to cry my eyes out(still doing that) and I got to hear our song.

_Every time I look at you, baby, I see something new_  
_That takes me higher than before and makes me want you more_  
_I don't wanna sleep tonight, dreamin's just a waste of time_  
_When I look at what my life's been comin' to_  
_I'm all about lovin' you_

_All about lovin' you _

**Hey! How'd you like? IT was sad, I know but it had to happen!**

**Review if you fell in live with Kendall in this chapter!**

**Review if you didn't, but I would think you would :)**

**Peace everyone! Stay strong!**


	14. Chapter 14

Hey guys~

So Sorry for the late update! I just had major writers block. To make up for it, I look I'd give Lucy some time to get rid of her feelings. I felt kind of guilty for just leaving her behind in the plot. So here is a chapter in which Lucy has a minor breakdown! YAY!

Disclaimer` I own nothing!

Tay's pov

"Are you freaking kidding me, Kendall?"

I moaned. What happened to my dream? It was nice. With no fire, hideous people and yelling. It was a perfect world for me. My eyes began to close again.

"No! I'm not James! Why can't you believe that I'm telling the truth?"

I squirmed. Darn Hockey Heads. I want to sleep! Seriously, I've gotten maybe 7 hours for the past four days.

I. Am. Freaking. Tired!

"Guys! Calm down, If we just get some Fruit Smackers and talked it ove-"

"Not helping Carlitos!"

I had to giggle. Carlos and his fruit smackers. Of course, one giggle turned to gut-busting laughter. I hadn't opened my eyes yet, but I could picture it now. Kendall's hair slightly ruffled, his cheeks red. James' hair perfect, arms crossed. Carlos in the middle, helmet strapped on and shiny. Logan exasperated, rubbing his face with stress. What I didn't see was the fact that I was on the couch.

To summarize, I fell off.

Not to gracefully either. They turned to me, wide-eyed. I crossed my arms and pouted. "I meant to do that." They gave each other quick glances. They were all biting their lips, avoiding my stare. I huffed. "Fine, go ahead. Laugh, like the hockey heads you are!" And with that we all started laughing. Carlos and Logan came to help me up. They hugged me, but gave me a sad look. I sighed and pulled away. I plopped myself on the couch. "Okay boys, Lay it on me."

James flashed over to me. "Is it true? What Kendall said?" I gulp. "It depends on what he told you." James bent down, meeting our eyes. "Where you going to throw yourself off the building?" I freeze, but I manage to meet all of their sad gazes. Tears prick my eyes as I nod. Kendall returns the nod sadly. Carlos looks over at me. Pain clear in his eyes. Logan collapses on the couch, staring up. But James. James is emotionless. He stares down at the floor. I choke down a sob. "Jamie?" He slowly looks up. I flinch at the new emotion in his eyes. Anger. I quickly go to Carlos. Grief. Then Logan. Betrayal. I dart up to Kendall. Guilt. A tear escapes my control. What have I done?

I go to stand up. But James shoves me back down. "Why?" He growls through clenched teeth. I cower. "I-I-I-… I just couldn't handle it!" I burst. James looked ready to say something else when the door broke open. Lucy and Katie came in. "There you guys are! We've been looking everywhere!" Lucy exclaimed. She ran over to hug me. "The party just ended. Are you tired?" I look around for a clock. "Wait what time is it?" Logan looks at his wristwatch. "Uhhh, quarter to three?" I blink. "In the morning?" I say glaring at the two girls. The nod sheepishly. "Bed. Both of you. You're probably more tired than I am." They go to voice their protests but James stops them. "No stay. We have something we have to talk about." I glare at him. "Not now James." He turns his glare on me. "Yes now Taylor." My glare softens. He didn't use the nickname. I turn to begging. "Just not now James? Please, I can't do it." I give a pleading look to the rest of guys. Kendall comes to my rescue." She's right James. We should all sleep on it, okay?" James shoulder slumps. "Fine." He mutters and all but throws himself into his shared room with Kendall. I start to head towards Katie's room but stop when I hear a crash. I look up to where James vanished to, there's a thump and I grimace. I look down. Too scared to meet any of their eyes. I gulp back tears that threaten to spill, AGAIN.

"Sorry." I choke out before I run to Katie's room. I sincerely hope I get some sleep tonight. I crawl onto my makeshift bed and hide my head. _I won't cry. I won't cry. I won't cry. I won't cry._ I felt a wet droplet free fall from my eye. I touch it. _Oh flip it! _And I start trying to cry my pain away.

Kendall's pov

I stared sadly as Tay fled to the room. Lucy stared dumbstruck after her. Katie turned to each of us then rested her gaze on me. I gulped.

Crap.

She was going to ask questions.

It's official!

I'm completely screwed.

Lucy's pov (Hee Hee lets see how this goes!)

What just happened? I ran through the past events and questioned every movement. What was wrong?

"What exactly was that?" Katie voiced my concern. The guys looked uncomfortable. My eyes narrowed. What had they done now? I may be 11 but I know depression when I see it.(A/N Nudge, Nudge, Wink, wink) Something was seriously wrong with my sister. I was worried. I turned to Logan. He was easy to manipulate, I mean get an answer from. "Hey Logie? Can you tell what happened?" I stumble over to him. He looks down. "Logan?" He gives a slight shake of his head. Drats. "Please Logan? I need to know!" He looks at me, pleading for me to drop it. "We promised Taylor." I stood up.

"And she's my sister! I think I deserve to know!" They all look down and avoid my eyes. I hiss at them. "What is wrong with you guys? She's my sister! I want to help! I need to now what happened to my sister!" Katie walked over to me and put a hand on my shoulder. I jerked it off. "I was there with Taylor. I helped her! I did what I could when she couldn't move! I did what I could when she was exhausted and couldn't do chores! I just wan to help! And I can! Do you think Dad never laid a hand on me? That I don't miss Mom? Or Grammy? I missed you guys too. I had Taylor, but I still felt lonely. I wasn't exactly popular. But I still had Taylor. And now I want to be there for her. " They were all staring at me. I looked down. I was surprised that I wasn't crying. I heard footsteps come towards me, but I didn't look up. The shoes were crummy sneakers with pieces of duct tape all over them. I sniffed. Carlos.

He hugged me. I clung to him. I was shaking, causing him to shake as well. I dug my head into his shoulder. "Okay." I heard a murmur. I felt a hand on my back. "We'll tell you, but it's going to be hard. For all of us." I nod and pull away from Carlos. I give a soft, sad smile to him and Kendall. Carlos moved me to the couch where Logan took me under his arm. Carlos sat on my other side while Katie sat next to Logan. Kendall squatted down until he was eye level with me. "Okay Luce. What do you want to now?" I gulp but keep a steady gaze. "What happened to my sister?" He took a deep breath.

"She tried to throw herself off the roof Lucy" He said with an unsteady breath. "But I stopped her, before she fell."

I felt tears coming.

"She tried to commit suicide?"

The boys nodded sadly.

Dear God.

~And there you go! What did you think? Should I write more Lucy point of view? I kind of like it. Please tell me what you think! And if any of you dear readers are Harry Potter fans, check out my fellow writer boookfreak1317's and mine story 'Transfer students'! We will be posting a new chapter soon!

Read and Review!

Peace!


	15. Chapter 15

Words cannot describe how sorry I am!

I know excuses mean nothing but I'll try to explain anyways!

School was rough and it took forever to finish!

I became an otaku (Anime fan) being this caused me to become very, very distracted. ;)

My life got in the way…yep my life is pretty complicated.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 came out! I LOVE YOU NEVILLE! I loved Neville before Neville was the hero who killed the Snake!

FRED IS NOT DEAD! Why can't my brother understand that!

Well anyway I'm sure you don't want to hear me ramble, and so after three months, I give you chapter 15 of Burns!

Enjoy~

* * *

Kendall's POV

The look of shock and terror was still implanted on Lucy's face. I was starting to get worried.

"Uhh, Luce? Are you okay?"Her eyes snapped to mine as she began to glare at me harshly.

"What do you think Kendall Knight?" She snapped. I cringed. _Idiot! Of course she isn't okay!_

"Sorry" I whispered softly. Her glare softened. But she still had a hard look plastered on her face.

"Why? Why would she do that? Wasn't she happy?" Logan appeared on the other side of me. He rested a hand on her shoulder.

"Look Lucy. none of us saw this coming. We thought she was happy. But she hid this from us. None of us could have known." She looked up at him and opened her mouth to speak.

"But, why?" Logan shook his head at her question.

"We don't have to ask why, right now. For now we just have to be there. And then hopefully, she'll talk to us."

Lucy looked down. she seemed hesitant, but she slowly nodded.

"I'm,...I'm gonna go to bed. See you tomorrow."

We nodded and I turned to Kaitie. "You too, squirt."

She huffed but nodded. I heard a murmur coming from her direction as she turned to leave.

"Umph, I'm taller than Tyler." I chuckled and followed her upstairs.

When I entered her room I found her engulfed by the covers. Her head was peaking out and a small pout was on her face. I chuckled again and leaned down to kiss her forehead.

"Good Night Little Sis."

She muttered a response. I turned to leave, but before I could open the door Katie called out.

"Kendall?"

I turned back to her. "What's up Katie?"

She sat up but didn't meet my eyes. "What's going to happen to Tay?"

My gentle smile turned down. The truth was, I honestly didn't know. But Katie was 10, I had to tell her something.

"Tay's going to be fine. She's got us remember?"

I gave her what I hoped was a reassuring smile. She looked up.

"Is it okay to be scared, Kendall?" My feet carried me to her bedside, where I sat myself down.

"Sure it is. I'm scared too, you know."

Her eyes widened in surprise.

"You? Really?" I gave a small smile in her direction.

"Of course. Life can be scary Katie. But you have to stay strong. Nad right now, we have to be strong for Tay. Can you do that for me?"

she gulped and stared me down with wide eyes.

"I don't know if I'm strong enough. But, I can try." I gather her up in my arms.

"That's all Tay needs, Katie. That's all it takes." She nodded into my chest. I gripped her tighter and kissed her head. I slowly start to stand up. I was about to move her arms when she gave a whimper of protest.

"Please? Stay?"

She looked up, her eyes glistening. How could I say no? I wrap my arms around her and whisper in her ear.

"Okay Katie." I lay her down and tuck her in again. Then I lay down on top of the covers and she leans on me.

"Good Night Kendall."

I lean dwon to quickly kiss her head before she falls asleep.

"Sleep Tight Katie."

* * *

Lucy's POV

I struggled to open my eyes. Dried tears were crusted on my face and I began to blink and rub them away. I slowly crept out of bed, and made my way to the kitchen. I stop when I see my older sister leaning on the counter, her eyes closed. My breath caught. She looked fine. Absolutely fine. Not someone who had tried to jump off a building.

My sharp intake of breath was heard by Tay, and she turned around. She gave me a soft, small smile. That one smile made my water and glisten with tears. She instantly noticed my tears and became alarmed.

"what's wrong Lucy?" She softly asked me. She began to move towards. I let out a strangled sob and dashed forward to meet her. My arms latched themselves around her waist and I began to cry openly. Her arms instantly wrapped around my frame and she gave a startled cry.

"Lucy?"

Her arms started to move comforting circles on my back.

"Lucy? Honey, what's wrong?" She asked in a soothing tone. I shook my head and buried deeper into the hug.

"Why?" I whimpered. "Why?" I felt her grip slightly loosen as she looked down at me.

"Why what?"

I pulled away slightly also. "Why? I love you Taylor? We're sisters! Why would you want to leave?" My whispers began to mix with squeaks as my voice got louder and louder. The longer I talked, the harder it was to keep the sobs, anger and frustration inside me.

I ripped myself away from Taylor's embrace. She looked slightly hurt but confusion was still clear on her face.

"what do you mean sis?"

I shook my head.

"Why try to leave? why would you try to leave me? Why? Why!" My voice shook as I broke into sobs. Through my tears, I saw Tay's face take on a look of realization then horror.

"Lucy I-"

I gave a scream to cut her off.

"No!"

I backed away. The steps I took were shaky and unstable, and I soon managed to trip over myself. Taylor instantly moved to help me but I scrambled away. She frowned and took a shaky breath.

"Lucy, I... well, I don't know why. I was scared. and confused. I was so sad an I couldn't think straight. I didn't believe that it would affect so many. And truthfully, I forgot you were in my life. I'm so, so sorry." She looked down. I stared blankly at her until it came crashing back to me. I jumped up.

"No! No, no, no! I'm your sister! You can't forget about me! You can't leave me!"

She looked up at me when I jumped. Her eyes were watery. I looked at my feet to avoid my sisters tears. Suddenly warm arms were around me and hot, wet tears dripped onto my neck.

Instantly, I struggled. I didn't want to forgive her so easily. She would just leave. Leave me. I must have protested out loud because Taylor responded.

"I won't leave." She gripped me tighter as I collapsed into her.

"I won't leave you."

* * *

So? Are you happy with the chapter? I felt that Katie should get a bigger part, and I just love a big brother Kendall! And of course Taylor and Lucy must have a close sister bond, and now they do!

And heads up, there are only going to be 1 or 2 more chapters of this. I don't want to overload the story. So just a heads up.

Bye Bye~

Review~


	16. Chapter 16

**Hey...yeah. I know, my bad. I really meant to update. Believe me! I had this chapter typed and in my computer and my account fails on me. My stupid parental controls that my dad set up wouldn't let me update! So thats why this chapter took 3 weeks to show up. But, I know, I really should have updated waaaaaay before that. Sorry! hope you enjoy!**

**I don't own BTR...but I really really want to!**

Taylor's POV

"I won't leave you."

Lucy tightened her grasp and buried her head in my shoulder. She was shaking. My heart shattered at the sight of my 13 year old sister.

We held each other for a few more minutes until we separated. Our eyes were red and puffy, but we had small smiles on our faces because of our small breakthrough with each other. I spoke up first.

"Come on Luce, how about we make waffles."

Her smile got bigger and her eyes brightened.

"You mean the ones we made with Mom and Trev?"

My smile widened as I remember the times we left behind in Minnesota. The happy mornings made up of laughter, flour, and syrup. We had made them almost every weekend.

"Yeah, those."

She immediately got up and ran to the cabinets. She shifted through the various amounts of cooking items and ingredients. I heaved myself off the floor and shook out my asleep legs. By the time I got to the counter all the dry ingredients were put in a large bowl. I got eggs and other wet ingredients out of the fridge and set Lucy to work on cracking eggs.

I found the waffle press and plugged it in.

"You think you can finish up the batter?"

She glanced up from where she was cracking the shells.

"Umm, yeah. Why?"

She giggled.

"Ok, but make sure to tell them they can't eat all of the waffles."

I give a snort of laughter to match her giggle.

"I will"

I slink up the stairs and creep into James and Carlos' room. It's not the neatest room. Hair care bottles and cans litter the bathroom and leave a trail to James' bed. The covers only reach to his waist and he's shirtless. The guys usually sleep with only pajama pants on. I've grown used to it, although they wear tanks, tees or sweatshirts when we sleepover at each other's houses.

I look at James' bed and see that his hair blocks his abnormally long eyelashes. I smile at his position and look over at the other bed. Unlike James, Carlos has a thin pullover on along with his pants. His helmet is on his head and his covers are scattered around him. Dirty clothes lay on the ground around his bed and stray corndog sticks lay on his side table. I tsk silently at him. He's been sneaking corndogs again. He was snoring, and his eyebrows furrowed adorably. I lean over his sleeping form and check the time on his clock.

It read 7:18 AM.

Ouch, the guys never wake up before 8, unless they absolutely had to. But, I brush past this fact and search for a way to wake them up. I scanned the whole room but found nothing. I sighed softly. I guess I would just have to use my personal knowledge to wake them up. I grin evilly as an idea pops into my head.

I start with James.

I creep to his bedside and lean towards his head, my mouth right by his ear. I take a deep breath and shout.

"JAMES! Free Hair Gel!"

He shot up immediately.

"Where! Where! Where-Tay?"

He was silent as he processed the situation. Then his head whipped towards me and his glare hit me full force. James opened his mouth to talk but I put my hand over his mouth.

"I still have to wake Carlitos, Jamey. Shh."

He pouts but stays silent. I make my way to the head of Carlos. I unclip the strap under his chin and in one swift motion his helmet is off and he is on the floor. I run to the doorway and toss the helmet at James.

"Luce and I are making waffles. DON'T eat all of them."

Then I sprint to Kendall and Logan's room. I rip open the door and swiftly shut it closed. I turn around expecting to find both in their beds, asleep. But to my surprise Kendall and Logan are both up. Logan is frozen, delaying his trip to the bathroom. He has his plaid pajama pants on with a t-shirt on. With his mouth hanging open and his eyes darted from me to Kendall's bed, he looked kind of ridiculous. I followed his train of sight and realize why he is so stunned.

Kendall's jeans are on the bed, along with a signature plaid shirt. Kendall however is only in his boxers. He seems shocked at my sudden entrance and is completely still. My face burns up. My eyes squeeze shut and my hand covers my shut eyes. I start gasping out apologies.

"Ohmygosh! I'm sorry! Sorry, sorry, sorry!"

I turn around to face the door. I squeeze my eyes tighter as I tried to think of another image besides Kendall standing there. My face had officially turned into a tomato by the time Kendall gave the okay to turn around. His face was tinted red and he averted his eyes from me. I tried to do the same but I couldn't tear my vision away from him. Logan had escaped to the bathroom. I opened my mouth to say something. But all that came out was a squeak. I flung my head down to avoid further embarrassment.

"Tay, it's okay. Come here."

I lift my head just enough to see him pat the spot next to him on the bed. I shuffle over there and sit gently. A million thoughts run through my head.

_God, I'm such an idiot!_

_ It's just like me. Walking in on Kendall in __just __his BOXERS!_

_ He won't talk to me again!_

_ And Logan was there to! He saw my huge fumble!_

_ Crap._

I guess I had zoned out because I got smacked out of it when Kendall gave my nose a soft bop. Apparently he had been trying to talk to me. My cheeks heated up again

"Sorry. Sorry."

He gave a soft smile. My cheeks got warmer.

"It's okay. It happens. What I really want to know is why you ran in here in such a rush."

His eyebrow quirked up cutely and he smirked at me.

"Well, I came up here to tell you guys that Luce and I are making waffles. But James and Carlos weren't up yet. So I had to wake them. They weren't exactly happy about that, so, I made a run for it."

He laughed loudly. Kendall grabbed his stomach as he laughed heartily.

"I can totally see that! Ohh, what did you do to get them so ticked off at you?"

I grinned, and started laughing to.

"I ripped Carlos' helmet off his head. And I screamed Free Hair Gel in James' ear. It totally worked."

I said through my snorts of laughter. We sat there laughing for a while until Kendall suddenly stopped. I looked over and was surprised to see that he had frozen. I look of shock on his face. I waved my hand in front of him and he snapped out of it.

"What's up Kenny?"

"You're making waffles. With Lucy."

The corners of his mouth were slowly sliding up. I tipped my head to the side.

"Yeah. And?"

"You're making waffles! This is the first time since then right?"

I thought it over as I saw his growing smiling on his handsome face. It _was_ the first time since Trev went away that we were making them. My own face broke out in a smile. My life was turning happy for once. I looked back at Kendall's smile.

"Kenny! I just realized something. Instead of people leaving my life. They're coming into it!"

My eyes got misty at the thought. I wasn't being left behind anymore. I was actually being brought along. And my family was coming back for me. My smile got wider as a tear ran down my face. Kendall looked worried. But I held up a hand.

"Don't worry. They're happy tears."

He engulfed me in a hug. A couple more tears fell but I ignored them and drove my head deeper into Kendall's shoulder. He smelled _really _good. He pulled back slightly.

"Did you just smell me?"

I blushed and shook my head rapidly.

"Of course not. Why would I do that?"

I laughed with slight hysteria in the laughter. My cheeks grew hotter. I sat up and out of Kendall's arms.

"So, waffles. Umm, tell Logan. And no, you can't eat all of them!"

I shouted at him when he opened his mouth to ask. I shifted on my feet for a moment, before I walked swiftly out of the room. I stumbled my down the hall, but stopped right before I reached James and Carlos' door. I could hear shouting from the inside and cringed. I sat and prepared to crawl across until I realized I could do this a much cooler way.

I sat up and began humming theme music. Then I ninja rolled across the door and flipped up and smacked my self against the wall.

"Hah, being a ninja. I can cross that off my list today."

I turned and lost my balanced on the stairs. I fell down the five steps and landed on my butt. I sat up and rubbed my developing bruise. I sighed.

"So much for being a ninja."

I huffed and blew my bangs out of my face. I heard a small squeak of laughter and looked up to see Lucy with her mouth being covered by her hand.

"Are you- ha ha ha- okay-ha ha?"

"Fine, I was just being a ninja and I lost my sense of reality."

This tipped her over the edge. She burst out laughing and fell to the floor rolling around. I glared at her and crawled over to her laughing form and stared down at her.

"Sorry sis, I just can't help-"

"Oh you better be sorry."

She stopped laughing at looked up at the evil smile I put on my face. I suddenly lunged down and began tickling her sides. We were both laughing and tickling each other until we heard the beep of the waffle press. We sat up and I turned of the heat in order to take the waffle out. I set it on a plate and we both inhaled. It smelled exactly like it did back then. We both looked at each other with huge grins on our face before we devoured it. It tasted heavenly and I instantly craved more. By the look on Lucy's face, she felt the same. We heard something collapse and turned toward the sound.

Carlos was on the ground, seemingly unconscious. Logan was crouched above him and was fanning him with his hand. James' and Kendall stared at us, shocked. They pointed from the plate to us and then back to the plate. Their Mouths hung open but James could from some words.

"You-.. the waffle-.. so fast-.. were are the….rest?"

They all snapped up and their eyes widened. They all suddenly got back the ability to speak properly.

"THERE ARE MORE RIGHT?"

They held up their hands in a pleading gesture and kneeled in front of us. I glanced at Luce and smirked. She returned the smirk and nodded.

"Well, we could make more…but, "

She left the sentence hanging. Logan jerked his head up.

"But, what?"

"But, what will you do to get them?"

"ANYTHING!"

They all screamed. I pretended to whisper in Lucy's ear. But really I was just murmuring the lyrics to _Worldwide_. She then in turn whispered "new song". I nodded and turned back to them.

"We command, that you sing the new song Gustavo wrote for you-"

They brightened at the seemingly simple task.

"-Dressed as girls."

Lucy interjected. Their grins slowly turned down as their mouths began gasping for an excuse to not do the ordered task. The timer beeped again and the smell of the waffle hit their noses. They got together in a group and began arguing with each other. I nodded toward the press and Lucy went over took out the waffle and began waving it in the direction of the boys. They stiffened and turned.

"Fine, we'll do it."

I grinned. I clapped my hands together in delight.

"Excellent."

This should be fun. I wink at Lucy. She winks back and smirks at the boys. They gulped. _Oh, this should be very fun._

**Yay! I had a lot of fun writing this chapter! And I _know_ I'll have fun writing the next chapter!**

**_hehehehehehehehehe big time rush dressed as GIRLS? Soooooooo funny. I hope I don't laugh to much writing it, or I won't be able to finish!_**

**_Peace! I'll be back soon! I promise!_**


	17. Chapter 17

**Hey guys! Sooo I was listening to BTR's new album Elevate and the song Your Not Alone came on. Instantly the hamster in my brain began running on his little wheel and this chapter was born! **

**This is in fact the last chapter! If an epilogue is wanted please request one in a review. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favorite, or followed this story! **

**I don't own Big Time Rush**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Taylor's pov

"…. dressed as girls."

My face morphed into a wide smirk as their eyes widened and looks of horror claimed each one of their faces. I started counting backwards in my head.

_5…. 4…3…2…1…and…_

A loud beep alerted us to the fact that another waffle was done and it's intoxicating smell reached the boys' noses. Their looks of horror mixed with frustration and they quickly huddled together. Lucy and I exchanged a grin and my mind drifted to outfits for the guys to wear. They turned to look back at us and I noticed James still had a horrified look on is face, as did Logan. Kendall looked determined and Carlos was still smiling and kept sniffing the air.

"All right, we'll do it." Kendall told us.

I clapped my hands together.

"Excellent, now, let's get you girls looking pretty."

They all gulped but followed Lucy up the stairs. I followed close behind and occasionally pushed the guys foreword when they slowed to a mere shuffle. We entered Katie and Lucy's room and I began shuffling through the closet. I had my clothes in there as well so the clothes would be closer to their size. I turned to the guys.

"We are going to be merciful. If you wish, you may grab a pair of skinny jeans from your rooms. But, make sure they are not baggy, if they are, you will be forced into a skirt."

They gasped and nodded before heading to their rooms to grab the pants. I turned to Lucy.

"Lucy, I have a special mission for you."

She grinned and leaned in to hear her new job.

* * *

_10 minutes later…_

"Well, don't you look gorgeous!" I gushed.

With help of Mama Knights blouses and a few of Camille's many wigs (courtesy of Lucy) all the guys had on frilly, flowery sheer blouses over camisoles paired with skinny jeans. They had necklaces and bracelets and even makeup. I fist bumped Lucy.

"We did good sis."

She laughed and nodded. I took out a camera and starting clicking away. They instantly flinched and covered their faces.

"Hey! No pictures!"

"What the heck!"

"No fair!"

"You put way to much mascara on me. I look trashy."

We all turned to James. He was moving his wig around and looking in his mirror. I put my hands on my hips.

"You have a problem with my makeup skills?"

He snapped out of it and grimaced.

"Of course not, I looked fabulous!"

I smiled and nodded. I glanced at the other guys.

"Anyone else?"

They began shaking their heads and waving their hands. I smiled and nodded. I headed out of the room and into the main area.

"Okay guys…. sorry girls. Set up your stage and wow us!"

They glared at me and began moving the couch to the side so they could dance and sing. Logan set up his IPod and hit a song. Music began playing and Lucy and I settled down in a chair. They took their positions and Kendall opened his mouth to sing the first lyric.

_I bet you didn't notice_

_First time your heart was broken_

_You called me up and we talked till the morning_

My eyes widened as all the guys looked at me and lowered their hands on an arc. They were singing to me. Me. My smile grew a bit bigger.

_And the time that you were stranded_

_I was there before you landed_

_He was a no show, I made sure you got home_

_I've been right there (right there)_

_For every minute_

_This time, it's no different_

_Whatever happens you should know_

With every line my smile got bigger and I reached out to hug Lucy. She had small tears in her eyes and my own began to water. We glanced at each other before we turned our watery smiles to the guys.

_Cause you're not alone, girl_

_Look over your shoulder_

_You don't have to wonder_

_Cause you know, you know, you know_

_You're not alone, girl_

_I'll be there to hold you_

_I'll stay till it's over_

_And you know, you know, you know_

_That you're not alone_

_That you're not alone_

Logan and Kendall came over and pick up each of my hands. They lifted me up and twirled me around. I saw James and Carlos do the same to Lucy. I gave a small laugh as the guys bowed to us before starting to waltz around with us.

_All the days that you were stressed out_

_Feeling like pulling your hair out_

_They were all missing but I was here listening_

_You gotta believe in me_

_Even if you can't see me there_

_I'll catch you when you fall_

_Cause I'll be right there (right there)_

_For every minute_

_This time, it's no different_

_Whatever happens you should know_

_Cause you're not alone, girl_

_Look over your shoulder_

_You don't have to wonder_

_Cause you know, you know, you know_

_You're not alone, girl_

_I'll be there to hold you_

_I'll stay till it's over_

_And you know, you know, you know_

_That you're not alone_

_That you're not alone_

Carlos broke away and began singing alone and dancing on his own. I watched him with a huge grin on my face. He did some ridiculous moves that looked even funnier with how he was dressed.

_I'll be here for you no matter what_

_Comes around the corner_

_Whoa oh, whoa oh, whoa oh, whoa oh_

_As long as I am breathing_

_You won't have to worry no more_

Next Kendall broke away to sing his solo and he ended it with a defying high note that hit my heart squarely. I took a sharp intake of breath when he turned and smiled warmly at me.

_Cause you're not alone, girl_

_Look over your shoulder_

_You don't have to wonder_

_Cause you know, you know_

They all began singing together and I sighed hearing their perfect harmony. I was twirled around once more and I almost collided with Lucy. We grinned at each other and started spinning each other.

_Cause you're not alone, girl_

_Look over your shoulder_

_You don't have to wonder_

_Cause you know, you know, you know_

_You're not alone, girl_

_I'll be there to hold you_

_I'll stay till it's over_

_And you know, you know, you know_

_That you're not alone_

_That you're not alone_

_That you're not alone_

_That you're not alone_

Their voices dimmed as they sang the last verse. They all had warm smiles on their face and seemed to have forgotten how they were dressed.

_I bet you didn't notice_

_First time your heart was broken_

_You called me up and we talked till the morning_

They were all breathing deeply and smiled at each other once they were down.

"So how did we-" Kendall started but was cut off. I had tackled them and began squeezing the daylights out of them.

"That was so good! You guys are simply amazing!"

Lucy joined the pile and also began shouting out praises. We began laughing and just sat there hugging each other for a while longer. Soon we all got up and smiled. I went over to James and reached up on my tiptoes to pull off his brunette long wig. I kissed his cheek and whispered a thank you. He returned the kiss and I turned to Carlos as Lucy gave James a hug. I took Carlos' purple wig off and kissed his cheek as well along with the same thanks. I hugged Logan and kissed his cheek before I grabbed his blonde wig off of him. He grinned and returned the hug Lucy was giving him. Kendall however was turned so his side was pointed at me. I decided to take him by surprise a leaned in to kiss his cheek.

At the last moment Kendall turned his head. Most likely noticing my presence and made my lips connect with his. My eyes widened, as I looked straight into his, which were also wide in surprise. I didn't pull away and my mind was full of so many thoughts, my head started to pound. _What the hell? How did this even __happen__? I'm kissing Kendall! Wait-Why haven't I pulled away yet? Why do I…why do I like it? I don't like Kendall this way. Right? Right. Come on Taylor just pull away!_

I shook my head and disconnected our lips. I gasp for breath because I hadn't breathed during our kiss. I instantly missed the warmth of his lips and I shook my head again. I looked up at him and his eyes held disappointment. I frowned at his expression and he opened his mouth.

"I'm so sorry. I really didn't mean to. I mean I know, you turned me down before so I'm really sorry."

My eyes widened at his apology. Memories swirled as I processed a new thought. _What if I do like Kendall? What if, I don't want him to apologize? _I thought back to all the times Kendall has been there for me. I remembered the late nights holding me and soothing my tears. How he could always make me smile and laugh no matter what. _Maybe….Maybe…I do like Kendall that way. That kiss, that kiss meant something. I'm not going to loose Kendall just because I might be unsure of my feelings toward him. I'm going to try. I'm going to try. _ A smile grew on my face.

"I'm really, really, sorry. I shouldn't ha-"

I put my finger on his lips. He looked down at me. My smile grew and he looked down at me curiously.

"Wait, why are you smiling?"

I shifted and pursed my lips.

"Oh no reason just…."

I pulled him down and connected our lips again. This time we were both into it and his hands cupped my face. I smiled into the kiss. _ Yeah, my feelings are no longer unsure. I do like Kendall. I love kissing him like this. I love the idea with being with him. This is going to work. _

We separated again. He looked down at me breathlessly and his mouth hung open.

"Really? Really?"

I grinned and nodded.

"Really."

He returned the grin and pecked my lips again. I turned and saw the others all making a heart out of their hands at us. They were all grinning and Lucy squealed and ran to hug me. Carlos joined the hug and started ranting about how he only got a kiss on the cheek. I laughed at him and kissed his cheek again. We crushed ourselves together once more into a group hug.

"So, who wants some waffles?"

Kendall hugged me tightly before saying "Can we change first?" I returned the hug before turning to the boys. They stared at me hopefully.

"Nope. Wear the clothes or no waffles."

Lucy started laughing and I joined in as the boys fell on each other. I turned to Lucy.

"Let's get cooking"

We laughed as they perked up and hurried to grab a plate and a spot at the table. Lucy and I made two plates piled high with waffles and set them down at the table. We took our seats and Kendall's hand encased mine under the table. I smiled at him and squeezed his hand.

I looked around the table. Each guy was dressed in girl's clothes and stuffing down waffles covered in syrup and whipped cream. Lucy was holding a plate away from Carlos, yelling at him to slow down and leave some for the rest of us. I grinned and reached for my own breakfast.

_Yeah, this is going to work. I've got my boys back and I have a home again. I'm ready to take on anything this messed up world has to throw at me. _I flash a smile at Kendall, which he returns full force. _ I'm ready._

* * *

**So, Whatcha think? Are you happy with the ending? Did all of you enjoy the story? Please leave a review of you wish for me to write up an epilogue or leave a review if you enjoyed reading!**

**Thanks to every one who followed this story! And thank you for sticking with it until the very end!**


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